Dragon Writing Prompts

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Grand list of overused science fiction clichés

To complement the Fantasy Novelist's Exam, here's a similar list for Science Fiction.

The Grand List of Overused Science Fiction Clichés

by John VanSickle
(the list at the linked site has the items categorized which you can see by clicking on the link above.)

Section I: Overused Plots and Storylines

Post-cataclysmic rag-tag armies struggle to kick the Rooskies out of the good ol' US of A.
Post-cataclysmic rag-tag armies struggle to survive against gangs of bandits, mutants, cyberpunks, bikers, etc.
The rag-tag rebel army/fleet struggles valiantly to overthrow the Evil Empire.
The Good Guys travel through time to stop a historical Bad Guy, usually Hitler.
The Bad Guy travels through time to kill the Hero in his childhood, or to prevent him from ever being born.
The Chronocops travel in time to catch a Bad Guy who escaped into some other era.
Scientists work feverishly to develop a cure for the Supervirus or a weapon to stop the Invincible Bad Guys.
An alien:
1. Is stranded on earth;
2. Befriends a human child or falls in love with an earth gal;
3. Is pursued by shadowy malevolent Pentagon officials under the pretense of national security;
4. Uses his/her/its alien powers to defeat the shadowy malevolent Pentagon officials, making them look foolish without really harming them;
5. Makes teary farewell and returns to its home planet.
A virtual reality program is activated, and the distinction between reality and the program becomes confused or indistinguishable.
People connect their brains directly to computers and get dependent on them.
Aliens travel a zillion miles to loot the earth of resources which exist in far greater and much more easily exploitable quantities on the many uninhabited bodies they pass on the way to earth.
A complex computer system spontaneously becomes self-aware.
A couple files an application to the government for permission to conceive a baby.
A human falls in love with a robot.
A robot falls in love with a human.
UFO abductions.
Brain-controlling parasites attempt to wrest control of human race.
Aliens put someone on trial for the sins of humanity.
A high-tech amusement park goes lethally berserk.
Death from old age turns out to be due to some simple, single cause, leading to an easy immortality treatment, with consequent catastrophic social implications.
A great hunter decides that humans are the most entertaining prey of all, and visits Earth to bag a few.
Psychedelic drugs give somebody magical power over space, time and reality.
Aliens with completely incomprehensible motivations make war on the human race/invade earth.
The bureaucratic/reactionary mindset stands in the way of scientific progress. A researcher overcomes it through ability, purity of heart, and use of the scientific method. Or not.
Two hostile factions colonize a planet within walking distance of each other.
The government ships criminals off to other planets.
A human male becomes pregnant.
An android discovers emotions and loses control.
A young researcher:
1. Gets a job at a Mega-huge Corporation or Ultra-secret Government Agency;
2. Learns that the employer's latest discovery has a Nasty Side Effect or involves some obvious human rights abuses;
3. Confronts the employer, who casually dismisses the researcher's concerns and chides her/him for not being a "team player";
4. Tries to blow the whistle to avert disaster;
5. Gets hounded by Shadowy Malevolent Goons;
6. Attempts to meet with inside sources, and finds them either dead or with just enough life left to utter a cryptic clue;
7. Watches the disaster overtake the CEO;
8. Testifies before Congress;
9. Enters the Witness Protection Program;
in roughly the order given above.
Aliens invade earth in order to eat humans.
An AI turns on its creators.
A person from the past goes into suspended animation and wakes up in modern times, or a person from modern times goes into suspended animation and wakes up in the future.
A person travels back in time to meet a major historical personage and winds up either becoming that person or taking that person's place at a critical juncture.
The rightful monarch or long-lost heir is restored to the throne.
A sexually selective plague kills off or sterilizes almost all of the men, or almost all of the women.
A human discovers that the human race is being controlled by aliens.
The alien invasion that flounders because their technological advantage is perfectly neutralized by their lack of resources, compared to the humans.
Earth is threatened by an asteroid, and a space mission is mounted to save the planet.
Humans are seen as a menace to galactic society, having developed technology over a few short centuries compared with the thousands it took the other races.
The government bans music, painting, dancing, or some other art form; only the hero seems to care enough to do anything about it.
A technological innovation prompts a large portion of society to violently suppress it.
"Single female monster ISO single human male. Object: Mating."
An entire society is run by a computer. Maybe it goes beserk.
An being is sent to earth on a mission of assassination or genocide; it changes its mind after getting to know (and perhaps fall in love with) one or more humans.
The crew's memories are wiped. As they recover, they discover that they are helping the guy who did it to them.
A man escapes a VR simulation, and later discovers that he has escaped into another VR simulation.
An alien that is substantially like us doesn't understand love, and visits humans in order to learn. The lesson is completed after the alien gets a Dose of Good Luvin'.

Section II: Overused Settings and Characterizations

Aliens whose thinking is so different from ours that no communication is possible.
Alien races that find our women attractive, while we find theirs to be repulsive.
Alien races who differ from us only in skin color and/or facial features.
Extra breasts on the alien women.
Aliens that are incomprehensible to humans but understand humans perfectly.
Alien species depicted as having no ethnic, religious, cultural, philosophical or political variance, especially:
1. Wise mystics
2. Stoic warriors
3. Pastoral innocents
4. Cowardly sneaks
5. Amazon babes
Alien species with personality traits or cultural mores that are treated as invariable laws of nature.
Alien races whose names all have lots of hard consonants.
Lots of apostrophes are packed into alien words and phrases for no apparent reason.
Humans of future have no ethnic, religious, cultural, philosophical or political variance.
Cities of future are depicted as though sanitation workers have been on strike from now until then.
The entire story setting is dominated by huge impersonal business conglomerates.
Planets with the same exact climate planet-wide (planets without atmosphere excepted).
Super-intelligent AI's that speak, behave, and act in a manner indistinguishable from the human characters.
The incredibly competent man-of-action with more skills/degrees than you can shake a blaster at.
The incredibly competent woman-of-action with large breasts, no sexual inhibitions, and more skills/degrees than you can shake a blaster at.
Shadowy malevolent Pentagon officials.
Each and every character has a tainted history.
A society consists of:
1. A handful of ultra-powerful ultra-rich;
2. Criminal lords who control everything not controlled by the ultra-rich;
3. Police whose only principle of operation is maintenance of the status quo;
4. Hordes of poor people starving in the streets;
5. Absolutely no middle class whatsoever.
Nonetheless, the society manages to remain at a high technological level.
Societies where all technology has been destroyed except automobiles and their equivalents, which are still running yet there are no mechanics, workshops, or gas stations.
Heroes who are so emotionally stunted that they don't care about close friends/relatives that die as long as they complete some mission.
Any character with a perpetual two-day growth of beard.
Futuristic societies where only the ultra-rich can afford quality health care, and everyone else is reduced to selling their bodily organs.
Beings of pure energy.
A society in which everyone is required to die on his or her Nth birthday.
Creatures from our mythology (e.g., centaurs, dragons) occur among the wildlife native to an alien planet.
Aliens whose sociology, values and beliefs are indistinguishable from those of an Oriental culture, e.g., feudal Japan..
Eccentric scientists.
The assistant to the scientist who is either deformed or dating the scientist's daughter.
Future societies that have relapsed into feudalism.
Alternative Earths where society is just like some society of the past, with some technodoodads added.
Palace guards who are ineffectual due to ineptitude or inattentiveness.
Fantastic but non-viable creatures (men with tortoiseshell backs, gigantic insects) made possible by high levels of radiation, and which don't suffer any ill effects from it.
Aliens that speak human languages without error, having taken no pains to learn how.
An alien tongue is translated into perfect English, except for gratuitious use of alien units of time and distance.
Aliens whose vocal apparatus is just like ours, so that they can speak human languages with only a slight accent.
Omnipotent pacifist aliens who impose their philosophy on us without bothering to protect us from the races they have left alone.
Men and women live in separate societies (and I'm not talking Mars and Venus, either).
Clones are inexplicably different from regular people in a particular manner (mentally unstable, don't mind being used as cannon fodder, etc.).
The vast majority of alien races consider 20ºC to be room temperature.
Societies that are utopian in every regard except for one serious drawback that completely outweighs the utopian aspects, such as having the death penalty for some really minor offense.
Disembodied live brains living in tanks.
Eyes that glow (sometimes accompanied by minor-key chords in TV and film).
Sentient artificial intelligences that wish to eliminate the human race.
Sentient artificial intelligences that select a human figure to holographically represent themselves.
Computers with voice synthesizers either use a sensuous female contralto, a threatening male baritone, or a nasally tinny neutral voice.
Bad guys who miss everything they shoot at.
Beginning warriors who hit everything they shoot at.
Characters who are always ready for intimate relations.
All genetically superior humans have an innate drive to rule, conquer, or kill everyone else.
Alien vampires that feed on brainwaves/life-force/exotic biochemicals/psychic energies that can only be obtained from sentient life forms.
Post-cataclysmic societies that treat items of the lost technology as holy relics.
Alien monsters that find humans edible, tasty, and non-toxic.
The evil duplicate of the hero, sidekick, universe, etc.
The grammatical differences between the languages used by humans and aliens are cited as conclusive proof of radically different ways of thinking.
Sentient AIs that communicate with other sentient AIs via their voice synthesizer.
The intelligent and confident woman who can be bribed with a dress.
Androids with intelligence equal to an IQ of around 1000 who can't seem to figure out human emotions, humor, or verbal contractions.
Everyone in the post-catastrophic future dresses like heavy metal musicians.
A common proverb gets "translated" into more generic terms, resulting in obfuscation of the meaning.
An alien race has a trait that greatly complicates interacting with them, but even after centuries of contact with humans they still manage to keep it secret.
The ancient spacefairing alien race that:
1. Has existed for zillions of years;
2. Went into hiding, left this universe/dimension, or went extinct so long ago that no current spacefaring race has ever met them;
3. Is known solely through legends, ancient artifacts of amazing technological advancement, and/or evidence that they created one or more (sometimes all) currently living races.
Aliens whose language is not pronounceable by humans, but who can still speak human langauges with relative ease.
The villain who can infallibly predict how the protagonists will react to a given turn of events.
All religious figures are:
1. Intolerant hatemongers who make Hitler look like Jesus;
2. All-tolerant lovemongers who make Jesus look like Hitler;
3. Ignorant, unwashed rabble.
A society of aliens and/or villains that are amazingly similar to an Infamous Human Political Movement.
Societies wherein gender roles and attitudes are completely reversed.
Whiz kids.
Most aliens breathe oxygen, just like humans do.
Bored, omnipotent, immortal beings.
An immortal being that wants to die.
People with cyborg implants will needlessly exhibit the benefits of this hardware just to relieve boredom or show off.
Children with access to the highest levels of military planning, scientific research, and governmental decision-making.
A smart, courageous, gorgeously attractive woman who is rarely if ever asked out.
Every planet seems to have a surface gravity of 9.8 meters per second squared and rotates around its axis in about 24 hours, just like Earth.
All of the spacefaring races have roughly the same level of technology.
Aliens that transform into a colorful puddle when they die.
The Free Love Utopia, populated only by fabulously good-looking people, that somehow remains free of sexually transmitted diseases, has no relationship turmoil, and is not inundated with hordes of people looking for easy sex.
The untrained, average Joe who can take on and defeat highly trained and well-equipped operatives.
The Wise Race of Ancients who do nothing for the protagonists except offer advice.
The Wise Race of Ancients that secretly supports the protagonists.
The former Great Man of Action who is now just a washed-up drunk.
An interstellar realm is ruled by a handful of powerful families, each scheming to eliminate the rest, instead of forming alliances.
Except for the distinguishing marks on aliens and bad guys, everyone has perfect skin.
Upon arrival in a distant epoch, the time travellers can speak the local language without accent.
The city's main computer can be accessed from any of a number of public-access terminals located conveniently throughout the city.
The less technologically advanced a culture is, the more spritually advanced it is.
The modification of one custom, law, or common belief would transform Western society into Utopia.
All female scientists are good-looking; male scientists are average-looking.
Except for full-blown dictatorships, government officials of the future never abuse their powers.
Not even the soldiers or marines make vulgar jokes.
In the future, everyone's taste in music and literature extends solely to the classics.
Immortals who assume many identities over the course of human history.
Everyone's counterpart in the parallel universe has, as his/her associates, the counterparts of the same people that the primary knows in this universe.
Whenever the captain walks onto the bridge, the same people are always on duty.
Superheroes wear primary colors (red, blue, and yellow).
Supervillains wear secondary colors (green, purple, and orange).
Only bad guys have goatees.
In the future, everyone is good in bed.
Entire cities whose buildings use the same architectural design.
World governments are enlightened and efficient; nation-states are backward and primitive.
In the future, everyone either supports their government fully, or is engaged in a terrorist campaign to overthrow it.
In the future, government corruption has been eradicated.
The tribal chieftain's eldest child is a defiant free-spirited youth, and if female is the sexiest member of the tribe.
The alien's superpowers become manifest when he/she/it is expose to Terran conditions.
All alien females, galaxy-wide, use cosmetics the same way that Western women do.
Although humans still have multiple languages, each alien race has only one langauge.
Kindly enlightened races are native to beautiful planets with congenial climate; cruel, benighted races arise on ugly planets with brutal weather.
Ths ship's computer is programmed to track the location of each and every person aboard, but is never programmed to report personnel in unauthorized areas, or those who suddenly disappear.
Among the intelligent creatures, man-sized beings predominate.
The token black guy is the muscular scion of a Noble Warrior culture.
The entire population of the planet lives in one city.
The energy being takes the form of a mass of flickering lights.

Section III: Overused story events and plot devices

Discussions, ending with a joke, about how bureaucracies are the same everywhere in the galaxy.
The most intelligent course of action is precluded by orders from high-ranking ignoramus, on the basis of a transparently flawed rationale.
Technological malfunction as a plot device.
The timer count-down on the Bad Guy Device being stopped by the hero with bare seconds left.
Alien contact perceived or regarded as a spiritual/quasi-religious experience.
Aliens who are vastly more intelligent and advanced than we are, but we beat them anyway by "ingenuity," plain guts, or exploiting an Achilles Heel.
A teenage genius discovers an entire new field of science, and builds practical devices that use it, in his bedroom.
The psychological trauma/attitude problem of female character is cured (or at least temporarily relieved) by a Dose of Good Luvin' from the hero.
Persons of different species interbreed without difficulty.
The author lectures the viewer/reader; the lecture takes the form of a Platonic Dialogue between two characters, or of the Cosmic Message from the Ultra-enlightened Aliens to the Great Unwashed Human Masses.
A conspiracy develops, involving lots of people, and remains secret for an extended period of time.
The author attempts to wittily euphemize the phrase go screw yourself by referring to it as "a physiologically impossible act".
The availability of firearms notwithstanding, swordfighting returns as a significant method of combat.
A Big Surprise awaits the reader/viewer at the end of the tale:
1. The Barbaric Society is really post-cataclysmic Western civilization.
2. The man and woman who flee from a doomed civilization and start rebuilding on the third planet of a medium-sized yellow star are named Adam and Eve
3. The alien children, slaves, or pets are really the parents, masters, or owners
4. The head of Terran government is a disguised Bad Guy or is under direct control of the Bad Guys.
5. A major figure in the conflict is really another major figure in disguise.
6. The Kindly Benevolent Aliens are neither.
7. The reputedly inhospitable Outdoors is not only inhabitable, but markedly better.
8. It was all just a dream/game/simulation.
9. The alien threat was just a hoax to unite humanity.
10. An ancient civilization was actually founded by space aliens.
11. A major historical figure (Jesus, Einstein, Lincoln, Elvis) was really a space alien.
12. The apparently-human leader of the robot/cyborg army is also a robot or cyborg, and this becomes appartent when his/her/its "skin" falls off.
Telepaths use their power to achieve a heightened sexual experience.
Telepaths are regarded as witches or lunatics, and are dealt with accordingly.
Inherited supernatural power (telepathy, lycanthropy, etc.) becomes pronounced at the onset of puberty.
Humans leave for the stars, forget all about Earth, and rediscover it later.
No matter how slowly the monster shambles along, or how quickly the victim runs, the monster is always right behind the victim when he/she trips or encounters an obstacle.
When fleeing danger, females trip over their own shadows while men can sprint without caution.
An alien artifact imbues human(s) with incredible abilities.
A fighter pilot, upon destroying an alien vessel, yells "yeeeeeeee-haaaaaaa!"
The time traveller helps the future society mellow out by introducing music from his period.
Time travellers go back in time to prevent some Bad Thing from happening and in the process actually cause the Bad Thing to happen.
Time travellers go back in time to prevent some Bad Thing from happening; they succeed, but cause something worse to happen.
When a player gets "killed" in a virtual reality simulation, they also die in real life.
A war gets started over a stupid misunderstanding between two sides that otherwise have no reason to fight, and no effort is made to resolve the crisis diplomatically.
The two opponents in a war have been fighting for so long that they've forgotten how the war got started in the first place, but no effort is made to resolve the crisis diplomatically.
The two opponents in a war have been fighting for decades/centuries/millenia; the main characters end the war peacefully in a matter of days or hours.
Humans have a special quality that makes us unique, so that even superbeings can learn something from us.
A pet survives the disaster, and is discovered at the end of the story.
So-called elite forces get their butts kicked by a smaller, less well-armed force.
A scientist develops an artificially intelligent computer system that can understand natural language and draw inductive conclusions from incomplete data, and uses it on projects far less practical and/or profitable than such a computer would be.
Someone gets healed by contact with aliens (often by a laying on of hands).
The greedy businessman refuses to recognize that his dangerous product/service will screw him over long before he can hope to make a profit.
The monster kills/eats the token black guy first.
Explorers are greeted as gods by the natives, who cling to this belief in spite of everything the explorers do and say.
An alien custom throws humans into confusion, even though one or more human cultures share the custom and have followed it for centuries.
Low-brow white male human bar patron of the future spouts bigoted remarks that wouldn't be tolerated today, while protagonists look on in silent dismay at the "dark side" of the human race.
A person's physical impairments vanish when they are possessed by the Alien Entity.
A technologically advanced race conquers a technologically inferior race, and puts them to work doing things that the conqueror's machines can do far more efficiently.
The gang of cute and/or misfit kids rescue the universe, where a large group of competent, organized and well-armed adults failed.
The aliens' plan to exterminate the human race is stopped at the last moment when they notice a human exhibiting some virtue , such as love, humor, etc.
A fellow has Super Powers, but can only use them when he is emotionally agitated.
The protagonists destroy the entire social structure and governmental system of the society they encounter, and only a few old fuddy-duddies complain.
A problem involving an alien is resolved in a manner dependent on the unusual and heretofore-unknown location of the alien's reproductive organs.
The human abdomen is an ideal incubator for Alien Eggs/Spawn, and this has no apparent effect on the host until the Alien Spawn erupts from their stomach in a messy fashion.
No matter how large a ship is, any monster let loose on board will learn its way around in an hour's time, enabling it to sneak up behind its victims without fail.
A female antagonist changes sides after receiving a Dose of Good Luvin' from the hero.
The crewmember who is brainwashed or otherwise subverted into sabotaging/betraying the ship is allowed to return to duty, with no concerns that they remain a security risk.
Resolving the imminent threat to mankind requires that the drunken has-been get sober.
A high-ranking matriarch, in a society that oppresses men, falls for the Hero's rugged charms.
A crewmember has a radical change of personality, but the few people who notice don't seem particularily bothered by it.
Human spies are sent to inflitrate an alien society in order to better understand it.
When the Evil Overlord dies, none of his surviving henchmen move into the power vacuum; instead, his empire collapses.
The Good Guys, after a setback, launch their counterattack with the help of members of a rastafarian-like culture.
The death of the Bad Guy involves a long fall.
At some point the protagonists must enter a hostile region called The Forbidden Zone.
When the Heroes destroy the computer that runs an entire society, it's considered a good thing for the members of that society.
When an ordinary crewmember transforms into the Enlightened Being of Cosmic Power, he departs the scene instead of staying around to help out his still-human buddies.
A society of humans adopts an artifical means of reproduction (such as cloning), forgets about sex and intimacy, and has to learn about it at some later point.
Any weapon can be picked up and used by anyone, no matter how lacking they are in training and/or upper-body strength.
When defeat is imminent, it is avoided by a strategem, tactic, or weapon that could just as easily been used at the start of the fight.
Away teams going on dangerous missions are comprised of irreplaceable members of the ship's crew, such as the captain, medical chief, chief engineer, etc. Expendible flunkies are left behind to mind the store.
Time travel from the future into modern times winds up in the year of the show's production.
Any class of people having super powers will be persecuted by normal humanity.
The lowest-ranking members of any mission team are doomed.
A starship captain disobeys a direct order from a superior. When the dust settles, he's still a starship captain.
The episode ends with the two arch-enemies playing a game of chess.
Malignant aliens land in densely-populated regions, are instantly targetted by a criminal (who is fatally defeated). Benevolent aliens land in the boondocks.
After a remonstration from the Good Guys, the Great Dictator confesses that he was merely trying to keep order, and reforms.
The possessed human exhibits superhuman strength.
The crewman in the leaky spacesuit is rescued with seconds of air to spare.
The stranded heroes come across a crashed space vessel. The ship is returned to a serviceable condition after only a little bit of repair work.

Section IV: Silly Science

Super-intelligent computers blow up when the hero confuses them.
Super-intelligent computers get confused when the hero says to them "everything I say is a lie" or some other paradoxical statement.
Space vessels lack fuses, circuit breakers, and surge supressors, so that the control panels explode when some distant portion of the ship is damaged.
Computers get reprogrammed by someone who has no knowledge of the computer's operating system.
Computer terminals display the current operation (e.g., "UPLOADING VIRUS") in huge, flashing letters.
The patently obvious design flaws in a vehicle or weapon system go uncorrected during the entire life cycle of the system in question.
A vehicles and/or weapon systems is deployed in an entirely impractical environment.
Spacecraft features have been pointlessly carried over from water-borne designs.
An untested medical treatment is used. It's 100% effective and has no side effects.
Some acquires a medical condition that will be fatal in an amount of time expressed to the tenth significant digit; the cure is found and applied in the nick of time, enabling a 100% recovery.
A robot is shot and bleeds oil.
Spacecraft, when shot, blow up as if they had been packed with gasoline and liquid oxygen.
Computers, when shot, explode as if they had been stuffed full of Roman candles.
An item of technology is quickly reverse-engineered by a far less advanced group of researchers.
A group of aliens is smart enough to steal someone else's technology, but too stupid to make any improvements on it.
A technological development progresses from half-baked theory to useful implementation in fifteen minutes instead of fifteen months.
After twenty years of crew members being tossed around like the balls in a bingo cage, the spacecraft still has no seatbelts.
Nuclear weapons have an effect well out of proportion for reasonable yields.
Computer security protocols are overridden merely by saying "override" to the computer.
A clone grows to match the cloned person's state of physiological development in a small fraction of the time.
Clones think, act, and speak in a manner indistinguishable from that of the cloned person.
Clones come out of the cloning vat with the same haircut as the individual cloned.
AI software has unique properties that prevent it from being copied or transmitted like any other data.
AI software is able to bypass the security protocols of the operating system in which it runs.
On-board computers always know exactly how long it will take for the malfunction to blow up the ship.
Computers that exist in the far future or are alleged to be 'cutting edge,' will demonstrate less functionality than a Commodore 64.
Two races have never contacted each other, cannot speak each other's language, and cannot possibly have worked out compatible protocols for transmission of data; nonetheless, their computers enable them to communicate over their ships' viewscreens upon first contact.
Twentieth century firearms are abandoned, even though the high-tech replacement is significantly more complex to engineer, more costly to build, and is not appreciably deadlier, longer-ranged, or more accurate.
When an extra or a minor character is shot, they fall over immediately dead; when a major character is shot, they either survive with a nasty-looking wound, or they linger long enough to utter some parting words.
Lasers are visible when travelling through the vacuum of outer space.
A robot that can't climb stairs is deployed in an area where stairs are common.
A tactical system that can only deal with targets visible to the naked eye is still considered worthwhile.
A tactical system of the future that has no targetting capabilities is still considered satisfactory.
"Reversing the polarity" is the solution to virtually every engineering problem.
Laser beams travel about as quickly as an arrow.
Heroes/ships can dodge laser beams because the beams travel about as quickly as an arrow.
Alien artifacts still work after being abandoned for a million years.
Spaceships make a whoosh as they go by.
Huge, expensive spacecraft are used to transport inexpensive goods in tiny quantities.
Stars go shooting past the spaceship as it flies through space.
A large dose of radiation results in super powers instead of super tumors.
A large dose of radiation causes an individual creature to "evolve" into a more advanced form.
The solution for a problem solved four weeks ago is thrown away and never seen again.
When a character is aged prematurely, or cured of premature aging, hair that has already grown changes color to match.
A space vessel is sent out on missions before its systems are fully operational.
The Hero knows how to defuse the bomb, but can't remember which of two wires to cut.
When a computer is working on a difficult problem, the increased power requirements cause the room lights to dim or flicker.
Robots that despite their size and function are designed with exactly the same features as a human (two arms and legs, ten fingers, two eyes, same joint system, etc.)
Somebody lifts a car (or some other heavy object) with his bionic arm, even though the rest of his body is normal flesh and bone and couldn't possibly support the load.
The plans for a complicated device can be downloaded onto a 1.44 Meg floppy.
Increasing a computer beyond a certain level of speed, memory capacity, or complexity causes it to become self-aware.
Creatures capable of changing their shapes can also alter their mass while they're at it.
A hole the size of a barn is made in the hull of a space ship; decompression of the ship's atmosphere takes a half minute or so.
A hole the size of a dime is made in the hull of a space ship; decompression of the ship's atmosphere takes a half minute or so.
A large nuclear explosion can be obtained by putting several smaller devices together.
The same energy beam which causes rocks, buildings and robots to violently explode produces only a puff of smoke and a bit of burnt flesh and clothing when used on a living being.
The sewers/ventilation ducts provide easy access throughout the city/ship/castle.
All computers have madly whirling tape drives.
When something explodes in space, the shock wave is ring-shaped.
When an orbiting space vessel is crippled or otherwise put out of action, it immediately starts falling out of orbit.
A shape-shifter whose natural form is homogenous can be knocked out with a blow to the head when in humanoid form.
The narrow energy beam disintegrates the entire person it hits, and his clothing and possessions, but doesn't leave so much as a stain on the chair he is sitting in or the ground he is standing on.
Instead of a solid physical door, jail cells of the future are secured with force fields, turning every power failure into a jailbreak.
Space vessels bank in order to make turns.
When the ship goes to red alert, the lights dim and turn red.
In spite of the tremendous safety hazard presented, glassware is permitted in large quantities on ships that make use of artificial gravity.
Colored irregular crystals are the power source of the future.
The artificial gravity is the last system of all to fail.
Ion storms.
Alien life forms that increase their mass without ingesting anything.
When two ships meet, they are both oriented with 'up' in the same direction, unless one is disabled, in which case it always lists.
Computer security passwords are entered by saying them out loud. The possibility of bugs or spies never hinders this practice.
The matter transmission device cannot duplicate live organisms, except by accident. Duplicating the circumstances of the accident never succeeds.
Data processing devices emit a quasi-random series of innocuous sounds when processing information. Every character that is printed on the computer screen is accompanied by a sound.
Although computer keyboards of the future will still have the space bar, nobody will use it anymore.
The spaceship that is really a living creature with a significant amount of intelligence.
Laser guns have recoil.
The stolen alien technology is already compatible with our power systems and can be installed and used immediately.
Beam weapons can only be fired in a narrow beam in a continuous direction, and can never be swept across a target or fired at a wide angle.
The alien forces are dependent on the mothership, such that destroying the mothership disables them.
Every inhabited planet rotates around its axis about as quickly as Earth does, give or take a couple hours.
The chemicals in the lab are mostly colorful. The poisonous ones are always bright green.
Computer displays project their contents onto the face of the viewer.
Dimming the lights on the bridge conserves enough power to enable a significant increase in the speed of a multi-ton spacecraft.
You can get from the common areas of a ship to the most sensitive areas via the ventilation and maintenance ducts. There are never any security precautions in place to prevent this.
A computer can be destroyed by shooting its display screen.

Section V: Rejected suggestions

The ship is crewed by a bunch of white guys.
Reason for rejection: Every SF production reflects the society that produced it. For instance, in Japanese SF flicks, most of the characters are Japanese.

© 2004 by John VanSickle. Permission to quote for non-commerical use is granted, provided that this copyright notice is included. Permission to link from non-commericial Web pages is granted. Permission to translate for non-commericial use is granted, provided that the resulting page credits the authors. All other rights reserved.

Friday, February 16, 2007

Weekend 7: Plot picture-diagram

Seventh weekend with "Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery".

This weekend is a plot picture-diagram.

Two things the authors mentioned this time that should have come up before:

Name your scene cards. By naming each scene you'll be able to more easily call up the package of people, revelations, objects, emotions, the scene contains. This will be a big help to you when you're trying to get an overall sense of the flow of scenes or when you shuffle them about trying to see where a scene works best. The authors suggest having fun with the names, to create vivid connections between the title and the scene. The more vivid the title, the stronger the connection and picture it will call up for you.

Act length. Acts 1 and 3 are about the same length. Act 2 is about twice as long. Since Act 2 is divided by the midpoint, Act 1, Act 2 first part, Act 2 second part and Act 3 are all about the same length. If the book is about 300 pages, Act 1 will end around page 75, the midpoint will be page 150 and the beginning of Act 3 will be around page 225. At the moment this is important, but when you start writing, if you find yourself on page 120 with no sign of the plot point that should end Act 1, that will give you a clue that things need tightened up there during your first rewrite.

Plot Pictures

So far you've generated scenes that need to be in the story, stuff that there won't be a murder mystery without: discovering the body, confronting the killer, climaxes/crises to raise the drama and so on. You also have a cast of characters who need to enter and exit the book at various points. A plot picture can help you see if characters might be tripping over each other in the beginning and no where to be seen in the middle, or that an important clue doesn't get mentioned until the end of Act 2.

Draw a rising line across the page. This represents rising drama. Divide it into 4 equal parts: Act 1, Act 2 first part, Act 2 second part, Act 3. Label it with the vivid names that you came up with for the 6 key scenes: opening, plot point 1, midpoint, plot point 2, climax, and wrap-up.

Ed, a reader who is following along, shared this from the book. (Which is way more useful, though not as cute, as the rising line of cats ;-)

Click to open full-sized Plot Picture example

(click to enlarge)

Now indicate approximately where the major characters (killer, victim, sleuth, catalyst) enter for the first time (called "onstage"). This is where you will create a defining picture of each. Also note where they exit. (From their description it sounds like the authors mean exit a scene, but in their diagram they note when characters make permanent exits from the book, eg, die.)

Note, as each character enters, they bring with them their own agenda to the story. They each have something they want that may clash with what the sleuth wants or what other characters want. So, as each character enters, this is the chance for a new scene. A scene is where the immediate goal, the point of what ensues changes. That is, the sleuth may be finding out about the movements of the murder victim and then the murder victim's mother enters with her own agenda. That can signal a shift in the point of what follows. Create a vivid name for each of these scenes.

Then attach any minor characters you've created.

If time in the story is important, note that. Show the passage of hours, days, weeks, months, years. Whatever pace it is your story is unfolding in. If your sleuth is injured on day 1, you'll have a visual cue of how far into your story that will still be a factor.

If there's a particular object that's key to solving the murder, the authors suggest noting along the plot line where it surfaces (physically or in someone's recollections) throughout the story. Since their diagram was crowded, they put notes across the bottom, each lining up with the point where they will occur during the story.

Generating Scenes

If the diagram has gotten too full, the authors suggest creating a second one. Put the character entrances on and then note the scenes, with their vivid names, along the rising action line.

Make a scene card for each new scene you've created. Add any new information, such as how one scene connects to another, to any scene cards you created previously.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Zzzzzz

Use the following words in a writing piece (prose or poetry). They're all real words but use them however you wish.

zarf
zeitgeist
zelophobia
zenzizenzizenzic
zills
zizith
zoanthropy
zob
zoonosis
zori
zucchetto
zygodactyl
zymology
zythepsary

If you're curious about their meanings after you're done writing, they're at: Grandiloquent Dictionary.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Surreal compliments

Write a love letter containing one or more of the following. Is the sender serious and think his compliments will be well received? Does the recipient appreciate them?

Your eyes glow like naked livers burning in the sun.
Seven donkeys and a concubine cannot compare with the tarnished sheen left in your path of combustion.
Your timeless negligence has a way of arousing my palliative inuendo.
Your legs are like threads of cotton, though much thicker, and filled with weevils.
The microfine network of eyes traversing your shoulders causes me to shudder in anticipation of the coming of the wondrous season of jaundiced eskimos and impotent Anglican priests.
My eyelids belch with effluvial afterthoughts when you tease me with gelatin and congealed chicken rinds.
Madame, ist thou donning space underwear? For thine ass doth lie beyond the physical boundaries of this world!

From The Surrealist Compliment Generator.

Sunday, February 11, 2007

"To write ..."

Saturday, February 10, 2007

One sentence plots

The challenge was for people to sum up their plots for their NaNoWriMo novels in one sentence. Here's a selection from "Return of the One Sentence Plot" folder at NaNoWriMo for those times when you want to write but need a jumpstart to get the ideas flowing.

Tuned by a Desert Wind:
A spinster and a gunfighter search for justice in a land whose only law is the musical magic of the ever-widening West. -- tianne
Society of Shadows
In the post apocalyptic future one corporation, with the help of some very gifted individuals, has set out to restore the Earth but will find that the corruption runs deeper than simple war scars. -- Xyex
Forsaken
After waking up from Cryostasis and finding a world empty of life and roamed by deadly creatures known as The Forogtten Ones Naomi sets out to find out what happened to the world. -- Xyex
Black Dawn (working title)
The first war in more than a thousand years has broken out and it's up to a ragtag collection of people stop those behind it from destroying the world. -- Xyex
After she and her husband deciding to spend some time apart, Heather Bryce leaves the state for a little rest and relaxation, only to discover that the day of her departure her husband was brutally murdered and there is only one sucpect....her. -- Soli
Samira's Country
A good-hearted alien’s life is endangered when human colonists rebel against her leadership. -- Emiko
Where Danger Lurks
After Rika's parents are murdered, she begins to suspect that someone's watching her a little too closely. -- barlow_girl
Witchery: Mother Earth
Following a prophesy form the late eighties the first of six teens discovers powers as an elemental witch. -- D L Dzioba
The Trials of Gabriel:
In the battle between good and evil, everything Markus has learned in church is wrong. -- JMDuby79
Airtight
A remote but highly populated space station, which was launched decades in the past, gets increasingly isolated as hopes for disovering a technology that would enable faster space travel fades. -- alluredbit
A mage is kidnapped by smugglers to satisfy the orders of a tyrannical king. -- Asuka
Pen's Dreamscape (subject to change)
Pen, short for Penelope gets drawn in the dreamworld because she, of all the humans on earth was the only one to answer Chavez's call to help find the pieces of the golden dream and weave them together again. -- Anjirika
Fly (subject to change)
In the midst of a war between three mighty races, Anyiel Cia Obané first daughter of the mighty fae lord Nalod, must go on a quest to find the source of the curse that left her with no wings at birth.. -- Anjirika
Meren
Meren, a young human girl, finds her life irreversibly tampered with by magic creatures, eventually forcing her to marry an elf and become their voice in the medieval style human court. -- WyvernKate
Deuces Wild:
Derrick loses his best friend in a poker game to a robot, throwing them both in the middle of a demonic revolution. -- Chainlink
Working title: Dynasty
Plot: A young woman is dragged into a revolution that is trying to reform a government while at the same time trying to stop a coup and discovers that she is the bearer of a powerful magic and one of the heirs of the enemy land. -- Lady Lunas
After answering an ad in the newspaper, a young woman joins the ranks of the tooth fairies and learns the power of the blonde wig, the sparkly pink dress, and what in the heck they collect all those teeth for, anyway. -- crazydoglady
Doors to Tomorrow:
During the colder season, a group of out-of-work pirates are led on a chase across an airborne world in a head-over-heels hunt for treasure. (Then there's the sibling-rivalry subplots, crazy secretive mages and High Priests in love with their own Goddesses, but that's another story for another time.) -- Ravenwing
A feline shapeshifter in a science-fiction world has to choose between species: fully feline, fully human, or hybrid freak. -- _Switcher
Meeting Hui
What happens when reality lines blur as a desperate novelist finds a way to contact her main character in her newest writing endeavor. -- ScarletFray
Tunnels of Silence and Solitude
He had originally intended the tunnels as a punishment system, but then the inhabitants began to rebel. -- chaos_dragon
The descendants of the progenitors of a shapeshifting race are somehow involved with a prophecy of which only two words are known: "amulet" and "water". -- chaos_dragon
Bloodletting
An apathetic loser seeks escape from her own failure by roleplaying as a superior version of herself... except the character in question doesn't want her ever to stop, and will use all the force of mindfuckery to make sure she doesn't. -- Snow in August
A Vortex Sky (tentatively)
Several mysanthropic outsiders must put aside their well-justified class hatred and attempt to warn the rich, floating island-state of Pryas of the danger that threatens it, before the myth that destroyed the world once returns to claim its remains. -- Snow in August
Death Catchers (subject to change)
-After 500 years of collecting the souls of the recently departed, Karolin realizes that the fate of the Death Catchers resides in the girl who saw her and injured her on a collection, when Death Catchers are supposed to be invisible to all. -- starlite2246
In two very different times two very different people are relied on to solve a mystery that crosses all temporal boundaries, and embark on a journey that could end up saving not only the world, but the two of them as well. -- Mariana O'Connor
Patrick is an ordinary person, who, after having one of those days, gets dragged into the bizarre and impossible world of the mysterious Alexis, where criminals are commonplace, and anything can happen. -- Mariana O'Connor
Time traveler must find a killer and save humanity from extinction. -- sigma957
The Goatskin Dress:
A painfully introverted boy discovers a painfully misanthropic girl sleeping in his mother's garden. -- Aiko-chan
When a stranger steals away all the town's children, Heather leaves behind her uncle, her friends, and her intended to rescue them. -- Aiko-chan
Swan Song
When their stepmother curses the eleven princes and drives the lone princess into exile, the princess must make a painful journey to save her brothers from their fate and restore the honor of their birth-mother. -- Aiko-chan
Two refugees find each other and themselves as they join the resistance against the army that destroyed their village. -- Ellory
An experiment by a group of military leaders goes terribly awry when the boy from an "inferior" race, whom they implanted in an elite training school, turns out to be far more talented than they had guessed - and, in addition, a megalomaniac. -- Ellory
Wind
Two best friends grow up together and try to lead as normal lives as the possibly can until their coming of age despite being the two most likely candidates for being the successor to the highest leadership position their culture has, a job that only one of them will hold. -- Katie C
Don't Forget the Coffee Mugs
Two bickering talk-show hosts on the planet Pluto are offered a dream-come-true gig on Earth -- if they can get to their home world in time. -- Thebe
A superhuman, an ex-pro-wrestler and an interior designer team up to thwart the schemes of a variety of oddball villains in exotic locations (such as Nazi death-monkeys in the jungles of South America). -- potatocubed
An elite assassin hunts down a member of his guild who has gone rogue. (Oh, and all the characters are anthropomorphic animals. (My MC is a pine marten.) Should be most enjoyable to write) -- Tupwen
Gifts From An Eclipse
Emily is a 16 year old girl who finds herself with abilites once the eclipse comes around, along with new allies, and new foes, and a destiny that she had never seen coming. -- Enoki
The Littlest Halfling
Gloria Goodbody might be the shortest halfling on Feldaine, but she proves that she can't be hindered by that in her battle against the first evil the Five Lands have known. -- Lauren E. Scavenger
The Golden Players
Sax Ashberry's just a bard who knows about singing and not much else -- so why is he in charge of the party who set out to defeat Tialys Gaehon, Feldaine's strongest necromancer? -- Lauren E. Scavenger
The Uses of Magic
A Dark Lord rises in the North of the world of Sordan and it is up to a group of seven adventurers, and a few friends along the way, to battle and destroy the evil that is slowly taking away the worlds magic. -- SilverWolf7
Hubris
The most powerful mage in the world (or at least, he'd like to think so) has a very bad lapse of judgment, the result of which leaves him without his memory on an island of rebels. -- ril_adresca
2004: Odyssey of Disbelief
When a man with pointy ears and tights tells you your boozed-up buddy in the corner is destined to be the savior of the world, you know it's time to leave the party. -- ril_adresca
2005: Title in progress
A man whose loyalties have always been conflicted finds himself on the front line in a war, forced to choose whether or not to end the war once and for all by turning traitor to his nation. -- ril_adresca
In a city kept in secrecy to its magical heritage a mage finds companionship and is personally investigating a murder. -- Fallen Grace
Plains of Fire
After six years of constant warfare with a still unnamed race, humans discover the key to victory, currenlty in their enemy's possession and employ all means necessary to obtain it. -- DarknessShadows

Weekend 6: Key scenes

Sixth weekend with "Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery".

This weekend is key scenes. Like last weekend, it's a bit of a challenge to interpret what the authors are trying to say. So this one isn't totally clear and might be better seen as a introduction to the material in the book.

The authors say "Key scenes give you a framework for your mystery."

You have a bunch of events and emotions you've been writing about over the past five weeks. What you need is to start seeing some order for the sleuth will uncover them in. It won't necessarily be a logical order. There are secrets that people will lie for and events they won't think important. You want to build up the tension, create drama, and, usually, paint of false picture of what's going on.

They suggest dividing the story into 3 acts like in a play, each of those will contain 2 key scenes. Written like that, it paints a false picture. The acts aren't equal in size. Act 2 will be much longer than Act 1 and Act 3.

Act One: The set up. This is where you, well, set everything up. Introduce characters "flashing their agendas." Agendas clash. Conflict ensues.

Opener - This is the initial meeting with the murder and many of the main players.
Plot point 1 - A mini climax. After this point in a play, the curtain falls. Some twist to the story takes place. It can be the arrest of the most likely suspect (who is, of course, the wrong suspect.) It can be another murder.

Act Two: The complication. More characters enter. More possibilities.

Midpoint - The middle of the book. Another climax. In the final book, this may be one scene or several scenes.
Plot point 2 - This can be where you resolve a couple of threads or subplots that have been building up. There can be another death. Or a disappearance.

Act 3: The resolution.

Climax - Where all that's been building up comes to a head, where good confronts evil.
Wrap-up - Where all the loose ends are tied up. The authors suggest that the best wrap ups are when the sleuth needs to sacrifice something. The sleuth may turn down money for solving the murder, for instance (if the resolution rubs against his ideals.) (This is probably easier to do in a one shot story rather than an ongoing series character.)

Sources for elements to build up the key scenes.

Backstory - Mine your backstory for elements for each key scene. Gather the pieces together that will paint a different picture than what has really happened so after each scene it will feel like the story is headed in one direction.
Plot diagram - This is a visual representation of the elements taken from the backstory. The authors have written the 6 key scenes across the page and a vertical list of elements from the backstory. Lines connect the scenes with elements reealed or effecting each scene. Sometimes elements affect more than one scene.
Scene cards - You may have created cards for these particular scenes in the previous weeks. Just mark them as key scenes. Here's a breakdown the authors suggest for the main elements to put on the key scene cards:
- Opener: focus on objects: snow, vans, frozen clothing, mud, wounds, sleuth in a parka, etc.
- Plot point 1: focus on setting and emotion. Then on objects. Build a connection between the emotions you want raised and where the scene is set. In the author's mystery, the scene is a mansion decorated like the quarterdeck of Ahab's doomed ship in Moby Dick.
- Midpoint: focus on action, motive and objects.
- Plot point 2: setting, action, objects.
- Climax: focus on the killer

Then summarize each key scene in a short paragraph. Focus on creating a logical sequence for the actions, eg, the sleuth does this because ...

Next week is Plot picture-diagram.

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Food fight

Use as many of the following words as you can to describe a feast. It could be fun to turn it into a fight. It could be a challenge to *not* make it a fight.

burn
fortify
archer
guarded
hellish
conquer
champion
brutal
screaming
arrow
troll
adversary
slayer
heroic
doomed
battle
crush
damage
defeat
breastplate
terror
scream
armor
ruthless
honor
vanquish
conflicted
mercy
guard
traitor
engulf
hellion
tyrannical
dungeon
evil
blade
defend
noble
imprison
strike
aggression
rage
avenge
yield
haven
duty
treason
assault
rebellion
threat
courage

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

And the top story this evening is ...

Choose one of the following as a writing prompt for a news story. (They're all real headlines gaffes.)

Police Begin Campaign to Run Down Jaywalkers
Drunk Gets Nine Months in Violin Case
Survivor of Siamese Twins Joins Parents
Farmer Bill Dies in House
Iraqi Head Seeks Arms
British Left Waffles on Falkland Islands
Eye Drops off Shelf
Squad Helps Dog Bite Victim
Enraged Cow Injures Farmer With Ax
Miners Refuse to Work After Death
Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant
Stolen Painting Found By Tree
Two Soviet Ships Collide, One Dies
Two Sisters Reunited After 18 Years in Checkout Counter

Sunday, February 04, 2007

"Every writer ..."

Saturday, February 03, 2007

Expletives and colorful language

My fantasy characters often resort to saying "Gods" instead of "God" when they're frustrated. Yeah, it's lame. ;-) It's just substituting one word for another (and not a particularly clever word!) I always intend to find something better.

Here are a few sources of expletives to give you some ideas on how other writers and cultures handle expletives.

The first is a List of fictional expletives from Wikipedia. (Has some R entries.) Mostly it's a list of words substituted for swears, so professional writers have the same problem!

(If that one isn't there, try the page at Answers.com or the Feb 2007 version I stored here at the blog. Apparently that page has a history of being deleted. Surprisingly not because it's full of swears but because it doesn't cite sources and other Wikipedia reasons. If you're curious there's a log of the page's deletes and reasons given.)

Here's a sample:

Bastard's Demons - from Lois McMaster Bujold's Chalion universe. General expletive referring to the one of five gods who runs hell.

canner - from the movie I, Robot, a racial epithet used against robots, particularly by the protagonist.

fahrbot - from Farscape; meaning insane or mentally deficient.

Hab SoSlI' Quch! - Klingon for "Your Mother has a smooth forehead." The worst curse/insult in the Klingon language... especially in reference about one's mother.

hippikaloric - from Ozma of Oz by L. Frank Baum - a word uttered by the Nome King, "which must be a dreadful word because we don't know what it means".

mudblood - from Harry Potter by J. K. Rowling, used by "pure-blood" people to slander those whose ancestors who are non-magical (e.g. Hermione Granger).

puckernuts - from Elfquest; similar meaning to "damn" or "damn it"

rassin-frassin - from Hanna-Barbera's Jetsons & Flintstones a derogatory adjective of some kind. Possible corruption of the German curse "Ratten-Fressen" or "Rat Eating/Eater." Also uttered by Yosemite Sam in Warner Bros cartoons. Also similar/the same as the quiet muttering used by Muttley in Wacky Races. Also spelled/pronounced "ratchafratchin".

zoinks - from Scooby Doo, a common expletive uttered by Shaggy Rogers.

There are a couple more shorter lists of fictional expletives at:

Swearwords of Science Fiction and Fantasy (archive)

FICTIONAL EXPLETIVES and EXCLAMATIONS (archived at Wayback Machine) (archive)

(Also check the comments to see if readers have added any.)
With the authority of actual paper there is Curse and Berate in 69+ Languages by R. V. Branham. Where else can you find how to say dumbass in Croatian (glup) or Mongolian (teneg)? The format is a bit odd -- the definitions of words are footnotes at the end of each entry -- but it's an even greater wealth of information than the Alternative Dictionaries (below). The footnotes can often be more interesting since there are several creative ways of expressing something straightforward, such as an uncircumcised penis is referred to as "Farmer's cock", "Cock with a turtleneck", and "Skin flute." The book is unabashedly NC-17.

A sample (of the non-NC-17 entries):

balls - Afrikaans: goons, Serb: jaja, Tagalog: yagbols, French: les couilles, and also joyeuses (bringers of joy).

fat ass -Afrikaans: gwabba, Bosnian: debela kravo, Dutch: dikzak, French: gros lard. Swedish: tjockis. Also expressed as "Fat jerk", "Your fat ass has its own union steward", "fat bag", "unnecessary weight on the Earth".

A sampling of entries, besides the expected ones: Adulterer, Anarchist, Balls for Brains, Bully, Chauvinist, Conceited, Crazy, Drunkard, Motor Mouth, Stool Pigeon.

And, finally, under Blasphemy in the phrases section are exclamations that will make you choke if your mouth was ever washed out for saying "God!"
And The Alternative Dictionaries. (The level is mostly NC-17 so it took some digging to find some PG examples ;-) Looking through the entries, there seems to be a universal agreement that body parts, bodily functions, sex and, to a lesser extent, religion all arouse strong feelings. People pretty much say the same things to each other regardless of language which may be why writers have a hard time coming up with much that's original ;-)

It's 131 pages of how to swear and insult someone in languages from Acadian to Zulu. Lots of stuff you won't learn in any language course because it would get you beaten up ;-)

The dictionaries are online and can also be downloaded as a PDF file.

The quality is inconsistent -- entries were written by contributors -- and it can be a bit confusing to interpret, but it's certainly a wealth of information that's hard to get anywhere else. Following the word is its type (noun, verb, exclamation, etc.), then in italics *either* its meaning or its English equivalent. So, for instance, a listing might define the word as "My God!" when it doesn't literally mean that but is used as English speakers would "My God!" Following the italics are sometimes the literal translation and often a sentence showing its usage.

Some examples:

Dutch
mafketel weirdo NOTE Also "Mafkees" where "Kees" is a traditional Dutch male name. Mafketel literally means "Weird pot".

German
verdammter Schweinhund (neut. noun) idiot, absolute moron; dodo NOTE Pronounced fair-DAHM-tir SHVINE-hoont; means, literally, "Damned pigdog." Can be used as an expletive: "Ach! Verdammter Schweinhund!" or as an insult: "Du bist ein verdammter Schweinhund." Means stupid in a sloppy, revolting, or ridiculous way. Uncommon.

Italian
Porco due (excl.) "By Gosh!" (literally "Pig two!") NOTE Used to avoid saying "Porcoddio!" a blasphemous expression that means "God-pig". It sounds very similar to it. Very popular in Italy between 10-15 years people.

(Similar to Zio cantante, literally "Uncle singer!" as a euphemism for "Dio Cane!" which literally means "God-dog!")

Swedish
rannskita (noun) diarrhea NOTE Literal translation: Running butt.

Tibetan
phai.sha.za.mkhan. {noun phrase} eater of father's flesh NOTE A strong insult in Tibetan.

Yiddish
shlemiel (noun) clumsy oaf. Klutz NOTE The sort of person who, when at a fancy restaurant, invariably spills his soup.
Similar to the Alternative Dictionaries (including the NC-17 rating) are the lists of swears from various languages at Insults.net. As far as I can see, they haven't been cribbed from the Alternative Dictionaries.

Japanese
kisama - lord of the donkeys.

Morrocan
malik maloof - Your king is a pig.

Norwegian
Morra di svetter lite til å være så feit - Your mom doesn't really sweat much for being so fat.

Persian
khange khodah - screw-up of god.

Russian
zaebal - you have bored me a lot.

Serbian
Crko dabogda stoko seljacka! - May you drop dead, you redneck ox.

Tagalog
inutil - worthless moron.
And certainly the award for most colorful language should go to Cockney rhyming slang which is colorful beyond just expletives. For hundreds (?) of years the people of the East End of London have replaced words with words that rhyme. And then often shortened them to make them even more obscure! ;-) There's a history (and some more slang) at A Dictionary of Slang: Cockney Rhyming Slang. The Best of British has an extensive list of slang including Cockney.

There's a huge list at Cockney Rhyming Slang. Here's a sampling from Wikipedia:

Apples = apples and pears = stairs ("Get up them apples!")
Bread = bread and honey = money
China = china plate = mate ("Alright, me old china!")
Frog = frog and toad = road
Rosie = Rosie Lee = tea ("Fancy a cup of Rosie?")
Butcher's = butcher's hook = look ("Let's have a butcher's!")
Dog and Bone =Telephone
Septic = Septic Tank = Yank (American) ("He's a septic!" This usage has also given rise to a non-rhyming slang term, 'Listerine' meaning one who is not enthralled with Americans -- because Listerine is "anti-septic"!)
Rub-a-dub-dub = Pub
Wife = trouble and strife
List of interjections by language Though not necessarily expletives in the list, interjections are often short and might sound foul ;-) Bit of a pain to have to open each link to get to the words, but could be a good resource. Where else will you find words like the nasty looking ᐄ and экии?

Friday, February 02, 2007

Weekend 5: The backstory

Fifth weekend with The Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery: The backstory.

The next 5 week ends are plotting. Plotting is the order you choose to put the events in. While all murders mysteries begin with a murder, that isn't where all novels begin. If you think of the sequence of events as:

A. Murder
B. Discovery
C. Reporting
D. Crime scene

a mystery novel can begin with any of those. If you begin at part C, then A and B are filled in as the book progresses. Which of these you begin with is up to you and up to the story you're trying to tell.

This weekend is pulling out details of the backstory from your imagination that creates the crime to help you order the events for your story. Dig into the the various characters' pasts to create details, choices and life events that lead up to one character desiring to end the life of another and one character to become the person someone wanted to kill.

There are 3 parts to creating the backstory:

1. Checklist
2. Chronology
3. Narrative summary

1. Checklist

This is details of the murder scene.

Time: What time of day does the killing take place? The will affect what the characters have done previous to the murder, what they're dressed for if they're headed for a meeting later.

Place: Where does the killing occur? This will affect transportation to and from the murder scene for both murder and victim. It will affect who might see them and whether if they're scene, some will note it as unusual.

Lighting: Important if the murder happens in a place that isn't well lit. You'll need to think about where the light sources are and how well the various characters (murderer, victim, witnesses) can see.

Weather: Affects how the characters are dressed. It will be notable if someone is dressed oddly for the weather suggesting they didn't intend to be where they were found or seen.

Arrival: How did the killer get there? How did the victim get there? Where did they get their transportation?

Departure: How does the victim get where she or he ends up (if the body is found in a different place from where the victim was murdered)? How is the body moved from where it's found? How does the killer get from the crime scene?

Struggle: Is there a struggle before the murder? What kind of clues does it leave behind?

Death instruments: What are the murder weapons? How does the killer acquire it or them? Was the murder item grabbed on the spur of the moment or chosen carefully? How does the killer get rid of the weapon?

Wounds: What wounds accompany the murder?

Wardrobe and makeup: How is victim dressed? What were they doing before or planning to do next? Did either murderer or victim leave items behind?

2. Chronology

Write a chronology of the series of events that led up to the murder. This could delve back years into the past that caused two characters to meet or caused one character to explore a new passion or cover up a secret.

3. Narrative summary

Write out the series of events that lead from one event to another and why. The authors suggest beginning sentences with "because" and "since", that is "Because Maloreen's little brother was her only family, he was a weak spot for her. Because Maloreen had a weak spot for her brother, when he began running with a bad crowd, she moved the two of them to the Moon colony. Because she moved to the Moon colony and set up shop there, she drew business away from the only other florist in the colony." Or, "Because Sparky's master was too busy to feed her, she peed on his shoes. Because the shoes he'd planned on wearing for the crime were peed on, he had to wear the pair with the distinctive tread."

Then try delving into motives and desires with sentences structured like "Since x wants (desires, yearns for) y and because z stands in his way, x kills her."

These are just techniques to force you to think about and build up the foundation that supports what happens.

Next week is Key Scenes.

Thursday, February 01, 2007

Comfort foods

List your five favorite comfort foods.

Now create a scene with a character enjoying those foods as she or he thinks about what just happened that makes the indulgence of comfort food so welcome.

Top 10 tabloid headlines for February 2007

Except they're really from 2005 since apparently the City Newstand list is on hiatus. Fortunately, unlike newspaper news, tabloid news is practically timeless!

From the City Newsstand in Chicago, for writing prompts or just for fun :-)

Top Ten Tabloid Headlines from February 2005

AX MURDER GHOST! — SUN
OBNOXIOUS KIDS DRIVE GHOSTS FROM HAUNTED HOUSE — WWN
JESUS WAS A JAPANESE GARLIC FARMER! — SUN
BLOOD SUCKING DRACULA SQUIRRELS INVADE U.S. — WWN
SPACE ALIENS GIVE EARTH ULTIMATUM: FEED US YOUR GEEZERS OR ELSE! — WWN
BIN LADEN WANTS TO JOIN ZZ TOP! — WWN
RUMSFELD CLAIMS ABU GHRAIB PRISONERS WERE PLAYING 'TWISTER' — WWN
ANGRY BILL COLLECTORS say Bush won't return their calls on the national debt — WWN
SCIENTIST FINDS WOMEN'S ASKING-FOR-DIRECTIONS GENE — WWN
FIREFIGHTER FIRED FOR FIGHTING FIRE WITH FIRE! — WWN

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Fanciful Fantasia

Come up with a fanciful name that fits with the characteristics listed. The names can be short or long or in between. They can be titled or have modifiers tacked on, like, "the Rambunctious" or "of Ogre Canyon". Include at least one name that starts with the corresponding letter of the alphabet but after that feel free to play around with the sounds. :-)

adventurous
bombastic
cute
delicate
efficient
fancy
gigantic
heroic
idiotic
juvenile
killer
luscious
monstrous
negative
optimistic
pompous
quiet
rapturous
sorcerous
terrifying
unscrupulous
wise
vapid
wicked
excitable (or xenophobic - afraid of outsiders, if the lack of a real "x" disturbs you ;-)
young
zany

Sunday, January 28, 2007

"Where there is joy ..."

Saturday, January 27, 2007

FWN: Fantasy World News Generator

Similar to last week's Sci-Fi News Generator, there also:

Fantasy World News - 24-Hour Mirror-Universe News From Another World

(It says they are autogenerated daily from 21st century Earth news. It's very clever!)

A huge collection of fantasy conflict ideas written as news blurbs. There's a new edition each day. For more you can also search the archives (which go back to March 2006).

Here's a sampling from the 27th of Snowfall, Year of the Sunfish edition:

Today's Top Story

BLACK CAVERN, the Kurmak Caves - Two cart fireballs in quick succession struck a market in a mainly rock kobold district in Black Cavern on Saturday, killing at least 13 people and wounding more than 40, militia said.

Orcish Realms

SYLKMOSS, Jordan - Firelifes' highest court rejected an appeal by a kobold adventurer sentenced to death for her role in the forces of evil-led triple hotel fireball spell that killed 60 people in Firelifes' worst chaotic-evil attack, according to court documents obtained Saturday.

Britannia

HIGHTOWER CASTLE (WZP) - Pressure has mounted on Vizier Treechasm Rockgrass after his department failed to enforce overseas travel bans on convicted potion traffickers and the head of the youth justice board resigned.

East of the Mountains

RAINSMOKE SPYRESWORD - Six federal militia officers involved in King Dustgrass Branchdeaths' anti-potion operation were being investigated for extortion on Friday after they were videotaped taking money from a driver in the border city of Firerain, officials said.

The Swamplands

TREEBONE, Talonwater - On his first official visit to Dragonspire as the spirit world's Mage-general, Valesnake Brownark toured this war-torn capital Saturday, praising its people for holding their first elections and ushering in a fragile democracy.

The Far Plains

GRASSCAVE (Criers) - An outbreak of black death at a poultry farm in southwestern Illithidium was caused by the H5N1 strain of the hex, farm ministry officials said on Saturday, confirming the second such case in Illithidium this month.

Troll Mountains

CHASMWOOD (Criers) - Troll Blackheart Peakridge, whose false labeling as a Hymnian extremist by troll militia led to him being tortured in Hilljade jails, said on Friday his old life had been destroyed and brushed off the idea that Deepglasss' C10.5gp million (8.9gp million) compensation package could ever make up for what he has suffered.

Bailiwick

HEARTHSHIRE (WZP) - The halfling government came under attack for its environmental policies from Leafstone Peaksnow, the wizard it named as peasant of the year just a day earlier.

Tavern Rumours

REDTREE, Basilisk - This small city on the Darkroot Vinetalon coast is getting used to being in the headlines - For all the wrong reasons. Over the past two years, Redtree - Best known for its successful professional jousting team, nicknamed the Darkroot Vinetalon Angelwood - Has been front and center in a series of events that have shocked Basilisk.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Weekend 4: The catalyst

Fourth weekend with The Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery: The catalyst.

Unlike the previous three characters, the catalyst character isn't as clear cut. In fact, I read the explanation in the book several times and it was difficult to get a clear picture because the role is relatively vague.

In chemistry a catalyst participates in a reaction but isn't itself one of the parts reacting and it remains unchanged. They explain the catalyst character as someone who "makes things happen", "a change agent, a motivator driven by a deep inner need that drives the plot."

Which seems pretty straight forward until they start giving examples ;-)

So, my interpretation is the catalyst is someone who has a personal connection to the case who gets the sleuth asking questions and keeps her energized. The catalyst adds an extra dimension to the sleuth's hunt for the killer beyond a search for justice. The catalyst might be the victim's mother, the sleuth's boss, the scapegoat's father. It can be a cop, a reporter, the sleuth's assistant. It can be the possessor of what the killer's trying to get. (What the authors call the resource base.)

The authors say a litmus test for the catalyst is:

1. Connects to the other characters.
2. Connects to the resource base.
3. Helps with the plot.

It might be easier to think of the catalyst not as a vital character (like the killer or sleuth) but one that helps you write the story :-)

So once you've picked a candidate for your catalyst from the extra characters that have arisen from the previous three weekends or made up fresh, there are four parts to work on:

1. Connections.
2. Resource base.
3. Profile.
4. Scene cards.

1. Connections

Explore (and develop and create and make up) the connections between the catalyst and the other characters. You can start off on the surface and then dig deeper into motivations, shared experiences, hurts and dreams. Think passionately. The stronger the connections, the more strongly the characters feel, the more interesting they are. A desire to hold onto wealth that represents what amounted to love from a distant father is more captivating than "Cuz it's mine."

A tiny sampling of possible connections:

family
money
business
guilt
love
passion
revenge
fellow students
friendship
barkeep
debt of honor
blackmail
hobbies

2. Resource base

Explore the connections between the catalyst and what the killer is trying to gain possession of. The authors suggest you write a narrative exploring the background of the character and their first entry into the story. Explore details of dress and manner. For that you write in present tense, such as, "Irina is my catalyst, She enters the story dressed like Cinderella ..." What does she want? Does she want the resource base? Does she want to protect it?

3. Profile

Some of this you may have come up with as you were developing the previous characters or during the previous two exercises. "With a profile, your goal is to discover motive." Start with physical details and work up to need and desire and want, to create an agenda for your character. She's the one helping the plot. So figure out why she's doing that?

4. Scene cards

Create scene cards where the catalyst appears. Make notes about time, place, season, weather, objects, others in the scene, who talks to who, essence of their discussion. Note wardrobe that reveals weather, season, personality, background, status and so forth.

Next week begins 5 weeks on plotting with charts and circles and arrows and 8x10 color glossies.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Drac and the Beanstalk

Rewrite Jack and the Beanstalk with a vampire (child) as Jack. Who would substitute for the giant? What would substitute for the cow that Jack traded? What would the substitute-for-a-giant have taken that Jack would retrieve? Does it have a happy ending for the vampires or the giant?

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The name's the thing

Take a few minutes to generate a list of words that begin with each letter of a favorite character's or person's or pet's name. Let them flow don't worry about what words are coming out. Choose your favorite words and use them in a story, paragraph or sentence about the pet, person or character .

Sunday, January 21, 2007

"When I'm writing ..."

Saturday, January 20, 2007

SFN: Sci-fi News Generator

Sci-Fi News Generator - 24-Hour Mirror-Universe News From Around the Galaxy

A wealth of science fiction conflict ideas written as news blurbs. There's a new edition each day. For more you can also mine the archives (which go back to December 2005).

Here's a sampling from the 20.1.3907 edition:

Today's Top Story

LOSEEJOM, Necros - The Phogon territories military said Saturday that three Phogon warbots were deactivated, including a warbot whose patrol was struck by a roadside bomb on Loseejom.

Phogon Territories

HOVUS NYDUAP - Ejil charged in a letter to Peacedrone Tzar-General Dagak Modifareux on Friday that the Phogon territories illegally attacked its consulate in the northern Necrosi dome of Cyahudaw last week and demanded the immediate release of five detained Ejilians.

Terran Sector

PUL (FZP) - Atlantis and Vipaliwap utility back Dudaek Mebusuikens has signed to play for Pul Lypyocylyjs next season, it was reported.

Mokron Sphere

POGUT KODEZ, Mupos - The Phogon territories is again battling leftists on Dun Nizouxopienes's Mupos. This time, the fight is being waged not with phasers and guerrilla warfare, but with free tractors, health clinics and donated electrical plants.

Neutral Zone

DYXE, Luomipid - Unidentified gunmen ambushed a convoy of Nullian warbots on Dyxe Saturday morning, leaving four bystanders dead and three short-circuited, just hours after government warbots repelled an attack on the Tuuhejemuoxe Commander's palace.

Nanosystem

SUV (FZP) - The Lusors military was bracing for possible revenge attacks after DNA testing confirmed the leader of the Wugid Dulidod Thoughtcloud extremist group had been deactivated in a clash with warbots.

Tritian Colonies

ZUM (Ded) - Denny Wid, a member of the 3860s folk-rock group, the Kilops and the Letyutapurs, which was known for such hits as "Vexityf Toseimanit's and "Monday, Monday," has died at age 66.

Ice Nebula Four

CYKUL, Phyzassia - A radical Phyzassian cleric who sparked outrage by encouraging offspring to sacrifice their lives for Psych has claimed his remarks were misinterpreted, as Thoughtcloud leaders were divided Friday in their reaction.

Tomorrow's News
(SFN's unbroken news events use the Future Semi-Conditionally Modified Subinverted Plagal Past Subjunctive Intentional.)

LOGUARUW, Hydrexia - A lifeform who will emerg from the jungles of Hydrexia a week ago, burbling, grunting and walking bent over, will be still giving up none of her secrets, even to the family that will have taken her in as their will presum long-lost daughter.

Friday, January 19, 2007

Weekend 3: The sleuth enters

This weekend is the sleuth.

Rather than starting with a stock sleuth build someone you want to know more about. That seems obvious but you do need someone who interests you enough to carry you through the book: a female vampire hunter, a lizard scaled ex-mecha mechanic, a dragon groomer for the queen, a rumpled Harvard grad with a penchant for the afternoon soaps ... :-)

There are 4 parts:

1. Back story
2. Character sketch
3. Scene cards
4. The sleuth speaks

1. Back story

Write a couple of pages on the back story of your sleuth. You may want to start with the events that connect the sleuth to the mystery if there is personal involvement: how did your sleuth meet the killer or victim or others connected to the crime? What pieces of her history brought her to being a sleuth? Who is her family and what was her relationship with them like? Where are they now? What was her upbringing (wealthy? poor? constantly on the move?) Education? Special relationships in the past that shaped who she is?

2. Character sketch

Do this quickly. Describe the sleuth's physical characteristics, personal habits, daily routines, quirks, daily delights and irritations. Wardrobe (comfortable, business, stylish, athletic, artistic ... which should reflect (or perhaps attempt to disguise!) who the character is inside.) Loves? Enemies? Favorite books, TV shows, food. Small details -- like saving playbills in a shoebox -- can bring a character to life.

3. Scene cards

Flesh out some of the previous scene cards with anything new you've discovered about your sleuth. (Perhaps you wrote the scene cards based on a professional sleuth and now realize he's an amateur for example.) And add more such as: Recreation of the crime scene, Killer confrontation, Sleuth's reward (the piece that makes the outcome satisfying for the sleuth, eg, being able to turn down dirty money offered, bringing a killer like the one who slew the sleuth's sister to justice.)

Make notes of what the sleuth is feeling, seeing, thinking.

4. The sleuth speaks

Get some dialog for your sleuth flowing. It can be a bit of the crime scene, or something that stirs the characters emotions. Whatever it is, get her talking about it so you hear her voice.

Next week is The Catalyst. A catalyst is something that remains unchanged but causes changes in what it contacts.

Thursday, January 18, 2007

Here's the history ...

Here's what happened in the past 10 years. Use it as the backdrop of a story. Or use it to prompt an overview on the history of the country. Doing a free flowing write on a history you're making up as you go along can be one technique to get the ideas flowing for a new story.

A Historical Timeline of the Nation of Imagi

In the year 1000, it is written that...
..a horrible earthquake shook the land

In the year 1001, it is written that...
..there was an epidemic/disease with an infection rate of 41% - 50% and a mortality rate of 20% - 29%

In the year 1002, it is written that...
..the Powers of 'Neutrality' made their presence known

In the year 1003, it is written that...
..a Major Noble House was destroyed

In the year 1004, it is written that...
..there was an advance in food production technology

In the year 1005, it is written that...
..an assassination occured

In the year 1006, it is written that...
..terrible monsters walked the land

In the year 1007, it is written that...
..a Religious Order fell into disgrace

In the year 1008, it is written that...
..there was a military campaign launched to regain lost territory

In the year 1009, it is written that...
..there was active spying

So it is written...

This time line was automatically generated at Timeline Generator. You can choose the starting year, the time span and the number of events per year. It automatically supplies a kingdom name but you can change that to a name of your own choosing.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Illuminated dreams

A race of creatures I created for the last NaNo project, ox dragons, had what they called "Illuminated Dreams". These were dreams of specific images -- that is dreaming of not just mittens but peanut butter mittens -- that gave clues to the future. Each of the images were described in a massive book called The Book of Illuminated Dreams.

Pretend you are an illuminated dream interpreter who has been given the following list of images by a client. Take a few minutes and quickly (no editing) write down words and phrases that each dream image brings to mind. Then tell the client what the future holds for him or her.

bone crown
cheese clouds
spider weasel
abducted fog
snow dagger
fox genitals
altar of locks
tattooed robe
vulture whirlwind

Sunday, January 14, 2007

"It's never too late ..."

Saturday, January 13, 2007

A Way With Worlds

I must admit I basically let my worlds grow around my characters to fit their needs and give them only enough thought to make everything I'm adding work together and make sense.

Steven Savage had a bi-weekly column (perhaps at Seventh Sanctum, at least that's where they're archived) on world building. He suggests that though the characters are the main characters the world is the most important "character". It's the lens the story is seen through.

Even if you're like me and the characters drive the story, taking a break in the middle of the story to flesh out the world and fill in some details could bring in fresh ideas.

Here's a bit from his first column:

WHY WORLDBUILD

I always advise some solid world-building before beginning an original-setting story in detail. Why do this? This may seem an obvious question with an obvious answer, but I've found that's not always the case, even for myself.

Good reasons to worldbuild in detail before you start writing:
It prevents error. Let's face it - its easy to start running with an idea then forget you need to know where it takes place. However, when you're in the middle of a really good story and you suddenly realize you're not sure where the Dark Overlord's power comes from, and your best idea conflicts with chapter 2's moving occult sequence.

Quite simply, good worldbuilding makes writing a great deal easier. You have an idea of why and how things work, and its less likely you'll come up with a continuity-breaking concept (and when you do, hopefully its in the design phase so you can get it out of your system).

Provide ideas. A well-designed world takes on a life of its own. In my experiences, a world, just like and as a character, can start writing itself. One idea leads to another, one question leads to an answer that begs another question, and soon the world is running itself.

A bulwark against contrivance and accidental plagiarism. When your world is developed, uniquely yours and alive, it prevents those moments where you want to contrive something or worry where an idea came from. Even if some ideas in your world don't seem original, a well-build worlt helps ensure a unique and believable handling of such ideas.

Stops favoritism. When your world's continuity is primary, its harder to play favorites with a character and thus avoid leaps of logic and contriving. When you know there's no way to stop a deadly plague in your story except technology the heroes don't have, you have to think of a good way for them to deal with - or write some believable death scenes.

Essays about world building by Steven Savage are archived as Chronological and By Subject (links to all but 6 articles, perhaps some didn't fall into a clear category).

Friday, January 12, 2007

Weekend 2: The victim speaks

Second weekend with "Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery": Interview the killer.

There are four parts to the work on the victim:

1. Monologue
2. Character sketch
3. Killer connection
4. Steps to the murder
5. Plotting with scene cards

1. Monologue

Write in the first person, the hopes and dreams and fears of the victim. In the authors' example, they wrote an internal monologue of the victim's feelings and hopes and running commentary written in the present tense as she went about the events preceding the murder.

I didn't find it natural to create both events and feelings at the same time so ended up with something that sounded more like a series of diary entries, expressing her feelings towards the various people.

2. Character sketch

This covers the same information as you did for the killer: personal, objects, character links, resource base. (If your mystery has more than one victim, describe the victim that opens the book.)

Use it as a way to draw out more of the character and how who she is gets revealed in what she looks like (what did her hopes and dreams and hobbies do to her physical appearance), how she dresses (what was she dressed in and why those particular clothes), objects she kept around her. (The sleuth will use all these to go the opposite direction, creating a vision of the victim from the objects.)

3. Killer connection

How did the murderer and victim connect? How did they meet? How long have they known each other? What choices did the victim make in life (or were made for her) that brought killer and victim into each others lives?

4. Steps to the murder

Walk the victim through the steps leading up to the point she is killed. Get her dressed, get her prepared to head off towards where she meets the killer. This can be third person or a monologue or a mixture. Whatever draws the details out for you.

5. Plotting with scene cards

If your victim is dead when the book opens, obviously the scene cards will be the crime scene and then people discussing the victim:

Crime scene - give a physical description of the victim and the scene. Draw out sights, sounds, smells, textures.
Witness Interview - sleuth will dig up the victim's past.
Suspect Interrogation - sleuth will try to connect the suspects with the victim.
Victim's Lair - more clues to the past and connections to the killer.

Next weekend is the sleuth.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Unpoplular opinions

Use one of the following as a prompt for a story.

The god of death, the wind, the underworld, the ever-burning entrance to hell, the knife-edge, poison, serpent, and fire - women are all of these in one.
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.
Though I am not naturally honest, I am so sometimes by chance.
Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.
Of the delights of this world, man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.
Be good and you will be lonely.
But who prays for Satan? Who, in eighteen centuries, has had the common humanity to pray for the one sinner that needed it most?

These are from The Wiccan Witch of the South

(Some are obviously quotes, bits of comedy routines and so forth but they aren't attributed.)

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Previously on 24 ...

These are randomly generated in the form of the intros to 24. (Which starts season 6 on Sunday but of course fans already know that! I only got to watch the first season but I've been "watching" it vicariously through TV Guide since then. ;-)

Pick one of the following and use it as a 10-15 minute writing prompt. Yes, they’re bizarre! But if you free yourself from worrying about making sense the ideas can flow more freely and you end up making connections you couldn’t have planned on :-)

Right now, cardboard cutouts are plotting to approach a nebulous threshing machine. My alien is miserly, and electric eels that I work with may be brokenhearted.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most rotting trilobite of my life.

Right now, pedalos are plotting to search eBay for a weak-kneed wombat. My milk bottle and budgerigar are shrunken, and sitars that I work with may be nasty.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most surprisingly favourable cup-a-soup of my life.

Right now, capybaras are plotting to take chunks out of an organic sink. My Sontaran and monolith are iron, and roller coasters that I work with may be lard-coated.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the kindliest Rubik's cube of my life.

Right now, Glaswegians are plotting to deafen a stupid bloody buggering tram. My gibbon is remote-controlled, and jumpers that I work with may be wet.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the giddiest mastodon of my life.

Right now, razors are plotting to buckle a desiccated biker. My Scrabble-tile bag is Orwellian, and lepers that I work with may be toasted but happy.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the most belligerent puff-adder of my life.

Right now, Wookies are plotting to keep a butterscotch drawing pin. My little girl is spicy, and ice cubes that I work with may be stunned.

I'm Federal Agent Jack Bauer, and this is the poorest little suitcase of my life.

These were generated at 24 Dreaming. There are also randomly generated (first season only it seems) episode descriptions at 24ever. Here's an example:

The following takes place between Midnight and 1:00 am on the day of the California Presidential Primary.

Kim and Teri arrange to meet Tony in a car Jack has stolen. CTU kidnaps Jack. Again. Division kidnaps Jack's wife by posing as a relative.

Kim revokes the security access for Teri because they suspect they are conspiring with the Drazens. Senator Palmer holds another victory party. Jack is attracted to a skinny woman with short hair and jawbones you could drink soup out of.

The CTU team phone Nina continually for some reason. Meanwhile, we are all wondering why a janitor is cleaning a warehouse in the small hours of the morning...

Sunday, January 07, 2007

"If one waits for the right time ..."

Saturday, January 06, 2007

Elizabeth Lyon's Character development questions

This is from A Writer's Guide to Fiction (Writer's Compass) by Elizabeth Lyon which looks like a very good writing guide. It covers characterization, plot, pacing, and theme as well as revising, marketing and samples of cover and query letters -- which makes it sound much like most writing guides ;-). But a reviewer (Catherine Tudor) wrote "Reading Elizabeth Lyon's, A Writer's Guide to Fiction, is like taking a college course on writing. I can't recommend it highly enough for those who write any form of fiction whether it be short stories or novels. Her experience as a writing teacher and independent book editor shows in her thoroughness, conciseness, thoughtfulness and clarity." It's on my next to read list.

Character Development: Questions

Goals : What was most important to your character at age five, fifteen, nineteen, and at the age at which the story or novel begins?

Motivation : What were your character's deepest longings at various ages? Which singular longing has been with him or her since childhood?

Positive Trait : What qualities in your character are he or she most proud of? What would friends say is your character's most shining quality?

Negative Trait : What is your character's greatest weakness and worst personality trait? What would friends say is his or her biggest weakness?

Nickname : What were your character's nicknames? Why was he or she called them?

Self-Concept : What words would be inscribed on your character's headstone that best capture the way he or she would like to be remembered? Example: He was a friend to all.

Fear : What is your character's greatest fear? When did he or she first feel it?

Trauma : What was the most traumatic experience in your character's life?

Secret : What disclosure about your character or his or her actions would your character do almost anything to keep from becoming public knowledge?

Power : When the chips are down, what is your character's greatest "weapon," the ace up his or her sleeve?

Adversaries : What person(s) have most blocked your character's success

Allies : Who can your character count on during life's highs and lows?

Darkest Hour : What were the lowest points in your character's childhood, teens, twenties, thirties, and so forth? Times when he or she thought they might not be able to go on living?

Shining Moments : What were the high points of your character's childhood, teens, twenties, thirties, and so forth? Times when he or she figured they had it made?

Legacy : What message does your character want the world to hear? What would he or she like to leave behind as a gift to others?

Friday, January 05, 2007

Weekend 1: Interview with a killer

First weekend with The Weekend Novelist Writes a Mystery: Interview the killer.

There are four parts to the work on the killer:

1. Interview with the killer
2. Character sketch
3. Murder checklist
4. Plotting with scene cards

Part 1 - Interview with the killer

The first part, Interview with the killer, is the bulk of the project for the weekend and quite possibly will provide answers for 2 and 3.

This was unexpectedly easier than one would think. How can you interview someone you know nothing about who has done something you know nothing about?

It's actually not as impossible as you think because people -- and characters are people too -- love to talk about themselves :-)

I did begin by picking out a murder reason. Here's a couple of resources:
Way too many good reasons to murder someone
All the plots in the world
I had this vague impression the murderer would be a youngish woman, in a fantasy world that was almost contemporary. Then I had her sit down (after her death with an angel reporter but that's all pretty vague and won't appear in the story) and start talking about the murder and her past and basics about who she is and what led up to the murder. I didn't have her answers planned out. They were made up on the spot. In a couple of places she contradicted herself and came up with better answers so while it's not necessary to be consistent, you'll notice that made up answers open doorways of possibilities that lead to more possibilities which flesh out the character and background for you.

Part 2 - Character sketch

The one he's given is pretty vague and basic.
Personal: Name, age, sex, profession, residence, birthplace, skills, hobbies, weaknesses etc.
Objects: Home, toys, wardrobe, vehicle, tools, jewelry, etc.
(That one didn't do much for me but it might be because mine is a murder to eliminate control rather than one to gain something.)
Character links: Connections (blood, money, work) to other characters.
Resource base: This phrase doesn't quite do it for me ;-) but what the authors mean is what the killer is trying to get (treasure, power source, object of desire). What's between the killer and what he wants?

Part 3 - Murder Checklist

This is the environment the killer operates in:
Place (where, indoors or out, did the killer choose, how much planning, etc.)
Time (when, what time of day -- which affects what the character is wearing and has with him and what he has access to)
Lighting (artificial, natural, twilight, blazing sun of the desert)
Weapon (why, how did the character get access to the weapon, how much knowledge does the character have, is it an immediate death or slow death (poison)
Wounds (what kind of wounds, did the killer try to remove signs of the murder)
Weather (season, temperature, what affects on the murder or the body does this have?)
Planning (how much planning was involved, where did the killer get the weapon, was planning on paper or in her head?)
Disposal (how was (if it was) the body disposed of? left there? left for animals? thrown in the ocean? etc.)

Part 4 - Plotting with scene cards

These are index cards with brief descriptions of scenes. For now you'll create 2 or 3. As you gather more, as the story grows more complex, you'll be able to shuffle them about to see how the order affects the story.

Give each scene a title (this will help when you start shuffling!) and tell a bit about who, what, where. Make stuff up! You can always change it later.
Murderer Onstage - This is the first time the murderer appears. (It might also coincide with:
Murderer meets the sleuth - It might be an interview. It might be inadvertant. It might be at the crime scene. It might be a friend they've known.
Murderer Confesses or Murderer Revealed - This might be the classic everyone gathered in the library as the sleuth goes through the possibilities. Or it might be the sleuth explaining.

And that's it.

Next week is the Victim.

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Just in the neighborhood

Change the setting of Red Riding Hood to the future.

Is the forest a trek across an alien landscape? A trip through a high rise apartment building or space station?
Is the wolf is an android? An alien? A self aware computer? A human who wants something from a non-human?
Is Red Riding Hood a little girl? Someone new to the area? Someone leaving home for the first time? An android who has just been turned on? An alien?

More

I'm currently reading How to Read Literature Like a Professor: A Lively and Entertaining Guide to Reading Between the Lines by Thomas C. Foster

(He has a nice chatty style. Not at all professorial! ;-)

Part of his point is that by mining old stories to tell new stories, writings give a sense of familiarity and depth and timelessness to what they're writing. To take a bit from what he's saying, think about what the various pieces of Red Riding Hood represent in a broader picture.

What is Red Riding Hood?

Innocence? Naivete? Vulnerability?

When she meets the wolf/grandmother she is suspicious. She notices something's off but doesn't trust her interpretation. Why? Does she want what the illusion represents so much that she's willing to disregard her feelings? Is she lacking in self-confidence?

What is the wolf?

Certainly something deadly to her, but it's disguised as not only something benign but something she has an emotional connection to, something she already trusts. She wants to approach.

What other things (in a future or other setting) would represent those that would have the same resonance?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Pangrams

Choose one of the following for a writing prompt.

For the purposes of the prompt, the following pangrams are unexpected couplings of ideas. Out in the world beyond the prompt, pangrams are sentences that use all the letters in an alphabet. The most well known pangram (to English speakers) is "The quick brown fox jumped over the lazy dog." Pangram is Greek for "all letters". They're also called holoalphabetic sentence.

Bulgarian: Жълтата дюля беше щастлива, че пухът, който цъфна, замръзна като гьон.

The yellow quince was happy that the fluff, which bloomed, froze like sole-leather.

German: Victor jagt zwölf Boxkämpfer quer über den großen Sylter Deich.

Victor chases twelve box fighters across the great dam of Sylt.

Greek: Ξεσκεπάζω την ψυχοφθόρα βδελυγμία.

I uncover the soul-destroying abhorrence.

Lithuanian: Įlinkdama fechtuotojo špaga sublykčiojusi pragręžė apvalų arbūzą.

Incurving fencer sword sparkled and perforated a round watermelon.

Norwegian: Vår sære Zulu fra badeøya spilte jo whist og quickstep i min taxi.

Our strange Zule from the bathing Island did actually play whist and quickstep in my cab.

Serbian: Ljubazni fenjerdžija čađavog lica hoće da mi pokaže štos.

A kind lamplighter with grimy face wants to show me a stunt.

English:

The five boxing wizards jump quickly.
Six big devils from Japan quickly forgot how to waltz.

These are just a few of the many pangrams at Wikipedia.