"Painting is silent ..."

Slick black Cadillac

Slick black Cadillac

What's a warm up?

The Velveteen Rabbi

There have been thousands upon thousands of "bookswithalettermissing" tweets on Twitter since it started last year. I tried. I can't even come up with one! And I'm usually pretty good with word games. (Okay, after I wrote that I came up with Tar Trek and Tar Wars while I was compiling the list below. Yay! :-D)

If you're game, drop a letter from a book, movie, play, song, TV show to come up with a new title. Then add on a short plot summary that is, preferably, related in a twisted way to the original.

If, like me, you're having problems coming up with the titles, I've listed some that you can create descriptions for.

The Velveteen Rabbi
Liver Twist
If You Give a Muse a Cookie
Huckleberry Inn
Lord of the Lies
Lice in Wonderland
Little Omen
A Series of Unfortunate Vents
Harry Otter
Jurassic Ark
Charlie and the Chocolate Factor
The Screw Ape Letters
The Holy Bile
The Virtue of Elfishness
Harold and the Purple Rayon
The Naked and the Dad
Eat of Eden
Tar Trek
Tar Wars
Little Emo in Slumberland
Clan of the Cave Bar
I Sit on Your Graves
Planet of the Aps
Zorba the Geek
All the Pretty Hoses
Return of the Naive
The Sound and the Fur
The Mayo of Casterbridge
Far from the Madding Crow
The Tree Musketeers
A Stud in Scarlet

It is the nature of tweets to be ephemeral, but some have been caught before they disappeared:

It’s the #bookswithalettermissing eBook! -- 500 in a PDF download from the guy who started it all and where most of the above examples came from. (His kids' humorous horror series looks cute too :-)

An article from the Huffington Post: Velveteen Rabbi.

Sludge factory

Sludge factory

What's a warm up?

"Unless I know what sort ..."

My apocalypse

My apocalypse

What's a warm up?

Your brain on religion

What if it was discovered that belief in gods was caused by virus? And what if there was a cure?

If you're focused on the negatives of religion, it's easy to see that as a good thing. It's harder to see from the viewpoint of someone who has found great solace and meaning in their religion, of someone who quietly and joyfully practices, never pushing their beliefs on anyone. Would you have wanted to inform Mother Teresa that her religious beliefs were the side effect of a bug?

What if a side effect of the virus is not just belief in gods? What if it's also responsible for artistic creativity? What if it's responsible for creativity *and* war?

What if it was discovered that belief in gods was caused by an odd-looking growth in the brain? And what if a drug could cause it to shrink? How does that change what unfolds?

It needn't be modern religion. It can be in a fantasy world. It can be several hundred years in the future. What ever sparks you.

Deviant SANCTUARY

Deviantly describe the structure without depending on the names of the objects to convey what they look like. Dig into what objects look and feel like rather than naming what they are. (Though these pictures already look otherworldly which makes it much easier!) It looks like a castle or fort. It's not. It doesn't look like what it actually is. Be deviant when describing its purpose, too. :-)

Capture the senses' experience. What does it feel like? What does it smell like? Taste like? Sound like?

Go further and find a mood or personality of the place and let those inspire the descriptive words you choose.

Try unexpected adjectives and vivid verbs. For example, svelt, sleek, oozing, crouching aren't words normally associated with places, but can create fresh images.

"When I used to ..."

No laughing in heaven

No laughing in heaven

What's a warm up?

A little less alacrity

"It is a mistake to allow any mechanical object to realize you are in a hurry." -- Ralph's Observation (related to Murphy's Laws)

So today your character is in a hurry and has foolishly let his clock know as he grumbled at it. The word quickly passes to every mechanical object in his pathway. Tell the tale of his journey.

Are the machines blocking him because they're irritated with humanity? Why?

Or do they have an ulterior motive for slowing him down? For their purposes? Or for his?

Screaming for vengeance

Screaming for vengeance

What's a warm up?

"In good writing ..."

Something in the way

Something in the way

What's a warm up?

Mind your tail

See them in action

About 20 of the estimated 35,000 feral dogs in Moscow can navigate the subway system. They know which trains to get on and which stops to get off to commute from the center of Moscow where they hunt for their meals to their industrial-complex homes in the suburbs. (The factories were in the cities under communist rules then moved out when communism fell, many dogs moving outward with them.) They even have their own website, though they still need human help to navigate the web.)

They have devised techniques to acquire food from humans such as the "bark and snatch" and "cuteness sells" The first involves a loud bark behind a human holding a doggie-gourmet shawarma from a vendor. Startled, the human drops it and the dog snatches it. In the second, the pack sends out the smallest, cutest member to plead for food which he or she will bring back to share. Some dogs position themselves along well-traveled pedestrian ways knowing food will be tossed without having to beg.

The feral dog population is divided into four distinct groups:

Beggars - the most intelligent. The alpha males will be the cleverest rather than the strongest. They're the most at ease around humans, but see them as merely meal tickets.

Guard dogs - see the guards at the many fenced sites around Moscow as their leaders. Though semi-feral, they receive food from the guards and defend the territory as their own.

Foragers - are human shy. They roam Moscow scavenging for food.

Wild dogs - are the most wolflike. They live nocturnal lives in the wooded areas beyond the outskirts of the city, wary of humans but have been known to attack.

So, what's it like for a freshly dumped dog who must find a pack if he's to up his survival chances? How do the groups get along? Unlike wolf packs, the pack leaders of the beggar dogs interact with each other. Food is plentiful in the cities so there's no need to compete. (During the communist era when food was scarce, pack wars might last for months.) What do the leaders discuss with each other?

Deviant CHILD

CHILD

.~          How does one Deviantly Describe?          ~.

Short version ...
From the given mundane, snoozer of a word, generate as many different-from-each-other descriptions as you can. (Set a timer for 10-15 minutes if you wish.)

Longer version ...
Is preserved at the HOME of the first Deviant Description.

"We do not write ..."

I am a Viking

I am a Viking

What's a warm up?

Gho-gurt

Yes, that's Pepsi and Yogurt flavor

Yogurt. Not just for weight conscious women. Now for your:

Dog
Cat
Dragon
Italians
Vampires
Inuit
Werewolves
Ogres
Scientists
Those funny green aliens with the big eyes
Football players
Zombies
Accountants
Ghosts
Vulcans
Trekkies
Frost giants
Cannibals
10-year old boys
10-year old girls
Wizards
Witches
Comic book geeks
Greek Goddesses
Greek Gods
Catholics
Fairies
Leprechauns
Jews
Pot-heads
Yetis
Androids
Barbies

Come up with one or more flavors for each.

(An unintentional commercial series as I eat a yogurt and remember the Bro-gurt episode of Raising Hope where Burt came up with manly flavors like hamburger and pork. :-)

Werewolves of London

Werewolves of London

What's a warm up?

"We have to continually ..."

Spanish castle magic

Spanish castle magic

What's a warm up?

Grab 'em by the balls

You're a TV ad guru and you've been hired to write a commercial for one of the following (or feel free to make one up):

• Olivander's magic wands
• Boeing's newest family moon cruiser
• Leash for a pet dragon
• Vampire repellent
• Zero G motion sickness drug
• Portable molecular transporter
• Zombie-X, the ultimate zombie weapon
• Trollerz, the dating service, no longer just for Trolls.
• OS X brain implant, the Apple operating system that needs no peripherals.

If you're not up on script format and would like to try, Script Frenzy (which begins in April!) has a tutorial that will get you up and running faster than a finger can hit fast forward.

Deviant TEMPLE

Wat Xiang Thong

Deviantly describe the scene without depending on the names of the objects to convey what they look like. That is, roof, fence, steps will conjure up mundane images for a reader. Dig into what objects look and feel like rather than telling what they are.

Capture the senses' experience. What does it feel like? What does it smell like? Taste like? Sound like?

Go further and find a mood or personality of the place and let those inspire the descriptive words you choose.

Try unexpected adjectives and vivid verbs. For example, svelt, sleek, oozing, crouching aren't words normally associated with places, but can create fresh images.

"A novelist's vice ..."

Dream Warriors

Dream Warriors

What's a warm up?

Cleanliness is next to godliness

From ROFLRazzi

Use as many words as you can but using only "safe for work" definitions, e.g., nothing about body parts or mating. :-) Feel free to play around with tenses and so forth.

It started with horn dog which struck me as an interesting word combination all on its own. Which set me off on a quest for words that could, um, go both ways. :-)

horn dog
scarlet woman
nuts
shorts
manhood
wienie
boxers
play boy
on the prowl
two time
skinny dip
hot to trot
kept woman
cheese cake
beef cake
wiener
tart
boy toy
melons
eye candy
wet dream
family jewels
boobies (they're birds! :-) They come in red-footed and blue-footed varieties.)
queen bee
pretty boy
play the field
well endowed
working girl
codpiece
foxy
pecker
hunk
sleep around
sugar daddy
horny
knockers
center fold
strip tease
backside
stud
love handles
short arm inspector (or inspection)

The sails of Charon

The sails of Charon

What's a warm up?

"Writers write ..."

Live at the inferno

Live at the inferno

What's a warm up?

Affectionately alliterative

For each letter of the alphabet come up with an affectionately alliterative sentence in honor of Valentine's Day.

ROAD deviations

ROAD

.~          How does one Deviantly Describe?          ~.

Short version ...
From the given mundane, snoozer of a word, generate as many different-from-each-other descriptions as you can. (Set a timer for 10-15 minutes if you wish.)

Longer version ...
Is preserved at the HOME of the first Deviant Description.

"Fiction writers ..."

The pride of creation

The pride of creation

What's a warm up?

Eternal silence

"Don't that make you suspicious, that the dead are keeping something back..." from the Witch of Coos.

Says the Doctor to his current companion as they step onto a green counterpart to the TARDIS littered with shrouded dead and neatly gathered bones.

Okay, you don't need to write Doctor Who fan fiction but set it in the future where explorers have found an alien catacomb and ossuary.

---

Quote from the Witch of Coos by Robert Frost.

Vanilla queen

Vanilla queen

What's a warm up?

"Writing is communication ..."

Ha! Though I would qualify "writing" as "writing for publication." It's accepted that people paint, create new recipes, take photographs without it being for other people. But there's a common assumption that people write to get published. It's okay to write stories and poems just for yourself.

Dragon iconography

Dragon iconography

What's a warm up?

A Charm of Princesses

Pick a handful of princesses and throw them together. Perhaps a detective agency. Crime fighters. Jewel thieves. Dragon slayers. Dog-fighters in the war.

Or pit them against each other: Enchanted Princess Pageant. Chefs on a competition show. All unknowingly married to the same man. Advertising agents.

(A reader asked if TV Tropes had a similar list for Princes. Unfortunately not. But linked from their Prince Charming page are The Wise Prince, The White Prince, The Evil Prince, Prince Charmless and The Warrior Prince. And each of those has descriptions of their qualities. Not nice and neat like the Princess list though.)

Types of Princesses, or characters who are often Princesses
(From TV Tropes)

• Badass Princess
  A princess who can actually fight.
  
• The Chief's Daughter
  The daughter of a native tribe's leader.
  
• Daddy's Little Villain
  A villain has a daughter/niece/granddaughter/etc. who takes after the villain.
  
• Everything's Better with Princesses
  Including a princess just because they are good to include.
  
• Fallen Princess
  A girl in a high position finds herself in a lower one.
  
• Jungle Princess
  Rules over the animals and natives in a jungle environment.
  
• Lady of War
  A high class lady that kicks butt.
  
• Mystical Waif
  A mystical girl that is often a princess.
  
• Ojou
  A girl from a high class family, but not actually royalty.
  
• Princess Classic
  The stereotypical princess character.
  
• Princess In Rags
  A high class lady that is now poor, but in denial.
  
• Rebellious Princess
  A high class lady who won't follow what is expected of her.
  
• Spoiled Brat
  A character given everything and treated almost like royalty.
  
• Spoiled Sweet
  A character is spoiled, but is mostly nice anyway.
  
• Tomboy Princess
  A high class lady who is a Tomboy.
  
• Well, Excuse Me, Princess!
  A high class lady who acts snarky toward her friend or love interest.
  
• Winter Royal Lady
  A royal lady who takes on a winter themed title and persona.
  
• World's Most Beautiful Woman
  She's often a princess.
  

Tropes related to Princesses

• Costume Porn
  Beautiful and detailed costuming, as befitting someone of her station.
  
• Distressed Damsel
  Princesses are often these.
  
  • And Now You Must Marry Me
    Especially if it means her captor will become part of the royal family.
    
  • Hypnotize the Princess
    Princesses are sometimes Hypnotized when they are kidnapped.
    
• Ermine Cape Effect
  Royalty and nobility wearing fancy clothes all the time.
  
• Everything's Better With Sparkles
  Sparkles are pretty.
  
• Everything's Sparkly with Jewelry
  Jewelry is glamorous.
  
• Friend to All Living Things
  Animals flock around a character, who can often speak to them.
  
• Girl in the Tower
  Captured princesses tend to get put in towers.
  
• Magical Girl Queenliness Test
  A Magical Girl princess must prove she can also be a queen.
  
• Pimped Out Dress
  Dress with loads of fancy trimmings.
  
  • Fairytale Wedding Dress
    A princess best get married in one.
    
• Princess Phase
  The time in a young girl's life when she idolizes all things related to princesses.
  
• Princess Curls
  Curled hairs at the front of the head, signifying a lady's high social class.
  
• Princesses Prefer Pink
  Princesses often wear pink in fiction, since Pink Means Feminine.
  
• Princesses Rule
  Princesses often are absolute rulers, rather than heirs, in fiction.
  
• Rags to Royalty
  A peasant ends up royalty, by either birth or granting.
  
• Requisite Royal Regalia
  The crowns, capes, thrones, and other things to signify royalty.
  
• Royal Blood
  Power inherent in royal birth.
  
• Rule of Glamorous
  Anything that makes a princess more beautiful is acceptable.
  
• Save the Princess
  A character kidnapped in a video game, likely a princess.
  
• Standard Hero Reward
  Marriage to a princess is part of this.
  
• Suddenly Suitable Suitor
  A character can now marry someone thought to be below that character's station before.
  

Troublesome ivories

Troublesome ivories

What's a warm up?

"Thus, in a real sense ..."

The dungeons are calling

The dungeons are calling

What's a warm up?

Good reasons for generous tipping

Yes, that is Hugh Laurie (House) as Wooster

Dulocracy: a government dominated by privileged slaves or servants.

So what would it be like for those with the money power to be under the legal power of those they employ or own? How would that come about? Did it start out as something very different that evolved into this? Was it a way to keep the rulers from letting power go to their heads? Why didn't the employers just fire the servants? (But of course, the servants would be in charge of the laws that determined when they could be fired!)

(I have no idea if one ever existed. It was coined around 1650, probably by disgruntled aristocrats whose servants were trying to keep them in line. Much like Jeeves. ;-)

Deviant CLIFFS

Deviantly describe the scene without using the names of the objects. Don't use rocks, grass or bushes. Dig into what objects look and feel like rather than telling what they are.

Capture the senses' experience. What does it feel like to your whole body? Does it get inside your clothes? Does it get inside you? What does it smell like? Taste like? Sound like?

Go further and find a mood or personality of the place and let those inspire the descriptive words you choose.

Try unexpected adjectives and vivid verbs. For example, svelt, sleek, oozing, crouching aren't words normally associated with places, but can create fresh images.

"One must be drenched ..."

In the bleak midwinter

In the bleak midwinter

What's a warm up?

Songmash

Doberman by Michel Keck

Use all the words from the lyrics of your favorite song in a story or poem.

Or try some Christmas carols. The national anthem. Other countries' national anthems. Happy Birthday. Monster Mash. Weird Al Lyrics.

Some suggestions from my daughter for science fiction and fantasy subjects. (The Vikings and Trolls are kinda loud so you may want to ease your speakers into them ;-)

• A steampunk band: Abney Park! :)
• Blind Guardian has a lot of sci-fi and fantasy lyrics so does Sonata Arctica.
• There's a band called Rhapsody of Fire who also love to deal with dragons!
• And Amon Amarth are Vikings…
• Finntroll like their trolls!
• Almost as much as Keep of Kalessin likes their dragons!)
• Sabaton is completely about War and nothing but.

---

If you'd like a list, paste the lyrics from the internet into a word processor. (Some sites are getting cagey about copying so it might take a few tries.) Replace all the spaces with carriage returns. Strip out the punctuation. Then paste the lyrics into Alphabetizer. It will remove the duplicates and sort them or randomize them for you.

Snowballed

Snowballed

What's a warm up?

"I write plays ..."

Don't eat the yellow snow

Don't eat the yellow snow

What's a warm up?

Frozen Dead Guy Festival

There are legends and then there's the truth.

For 50 years the town of Gnaw Bone has been irreverently celebrating the anniversary of the frozen dead guy who floated into town on a freakish midwinter melt encased in a chunk of ice. During the festival, along with coffin races, ice sculptures and funeral-paced parades, tours of his chilly resting place where he remains frozen are available.

No one knows who he was but of course stories have grown into bigger-than life legends.

And then, with advances in cryogenics, a group offers to revive him. The town is divided. The Frozen Dead Guy is their one yearly opportunity to be more than a backwater town. He's also a human being with the opportunity to carry on with his life. Or did he give that up once he became frozen?

Take this in whatever direction you wish. You can create the legends. You can debate multiple sides of the issue. You can explore what happens if he is revived.

---

Inspired by Frozen Dead Guy Days celebrated in Nederland, CO.

Deviantly TATTOOed

TATTOO

.~          How does one Deviantly Describe?          ~.

Short version ...

From the given mundane, snoozer of a word, generate as many different-from-each-other descriptions as you can. (Set a timer for 10-15 minutes if you wish.)

Longer version ...

Is preserved at the HOME of the first Deviant Description.

"I think in terms ..."

Wizards in winter

Wizards in winter

What's a warm up?

Transanimalation

An animal wandered into your home and decided it wasn't going to leave. As the days pass, you get the oddest feeling you know this animal, except as a human. Eventually it's impossible to deny this animal was someone famous.

Do they begin speaking? Do they want to reclaim their previous fame? Do they have unfinished business?

It can be a famous person from this world, from the world your characters are in, or from a story brought into the mundane here-and-now world.

Mistress for Christmas

Mistress for Christmas

What's a warm up?

"To write simply ..."

No Holly for Miss Quinn

No Holly for Miss Quinn

What's a warm up?

Christmas fantasies

Magical Arrival by Anne Stokes

You've been transported to another world by one of those pervasive mysterious vortexes that are always plucking people and hurling them to mysterious locals.

Your watch tells you it's almost Christmas. It makes no difference whether the time on your new world matches home, darn it, you're feeling homesick and nostalgic and want to celebrate Christmas.

So how do you pump up the idea of Christmas to get those around you intrigued? What are you able to recreate? What compromises need to be made? What new ideas do your otherworlders have? Is there a Scrooge among them?

Here's wishing you a Merry Christmas in whatever world you're occupying this season! :-)

Deviant CAVE

Deviantly describe the image. Don't use rock or water. Dig into what objects look and feel like rather than telling what they are. Capture the senses' experience. What does it feel like to your whole body? What does it sound like. What does it smell like? Taste like?

Go further and find a mood or personality of the place and let those inspire the descriptive words you choose.

Try unexpected adjectives and vivid verbs. For example, svelt, sleek, oozing, crouching aren't words normally associated with places, but can create fresh images.