Hot mail

Mom's been waiting in Heaven for you for a while and your time has finally come to join her. But, oops, turns out you need some chastisement for some earthly indiscretions. As a matter of fact, your transgressions are pretty serious and your stay in the nether world has no end date in sight.

But you don't want to upset Mom (your one redeeming value). Write her an upbeat and reassuring letter to let her know it will just be a little longer before you get to join her.