Cursed blessings

Ming is the evil dictator from Flash Gordon. Choose one of his "blessings" below and tell what happened afterwards.

• May your porridge be infused with the impervious foulings licking from the slime hole of a Quisnaglian Klitbunkit.
  
• May your drawers be filled with the fuscous evacuation fondling from the secret cavity of a Ickian Zyzygdung.
  
• Your wish is granted: drink the opacous nastiness regurgitating from the sweat void of a Crongian Cankerlicker.
  
• Everyone knows you bathe in the opaline off-scum rejecting from the underarm cavity of a Kterigadian Pimple Popper.
  
• Yeah? Well, your Mentor wears combat boots filled with the maroon matter plucking from the sweat hole of a Hogsodian Crotchbug.
  
• May you die of the khaki guano needing from the slime openings of a Lilgoogian Danglidwid.
  
• May you drown in the diaphanous draggletail distending from the ooze hole of a Haagpokian Yaghord.

More blessings available at Ming Blessings.