Spoonerisms

Spoonerisms are made (usually by mistake!) by switching the beginning sound of two words to make a stunny fatement, er, funny statement. So instead of saying "you missed my history lecture" it comes out "You hissed my mystery lecture." To get your spooner oiled, here's some from the website I linked below so these all can turn into things people thought funny. (Try doing them out loud so you aren't confounded by odd spelling (like "mistery")

If you want to keep going, try a list of fairy tales, favorite movies, favorite books, friends' names, names from Parry Hotter, and so on.

lighting a fire
battle ships and cruisers
cosy little nook
a crushing blow
sons of toil
we'll have the flags hung out
you've wasted two terms
our loving shepherd
a half-formed wish
is the Dean busy?
blow your nose
go and take a shower
ease my tears
picking your nose
you have very bad manners
pack of lies
it's pouring with rain
healing the sick
so help me God
nit picking
foul beast
I'm a stamp dealer
save the whales
flipping the channel on TV
bad money
I'm out of the shower
speed of light
this is the fun part
I hit my funny bone
butterfly
wedding bells
I must send the mail
it falls through the cracks
my lips are zipped
flat battery
would you like a hazel nut?
coupon
jelly beans
bye all
right in your face
steady as a rock
toe nails
listen here
bowl of salad

If you want to add on a writing prompt to this, set the timer for 10-15 minutes and pick your favorite (or a handful of your favorites) and use them.

BTW, the Spoonerisms page (which is where the above list came from) has a bit about the guy who became famous (or infamous) for them, some Spoonerism terry fails, er, fairy tales.